Captain Cleanoff

To start, this little album is one of my most cherished possessions. I write in blood: I mined ebay for a span of no less than two years before I finally got a hold of a copy. Well, actually, that's not entirely true. I did in fact, win this EP twice; the first time within early "year one" - unfortunately, the first seller didn't come through for me... claimed it was stolen from his record store or something. Whatever.

You may consider me biased after reading that, but really, this is one of No Escape's most immaculate moments, and my disposition really couldn't bump up it's worth any higher than it already is. Captain Cleanoff play straight-up, old school Grindcore straight from the sweaty fingertips of the genre's acclaimed visionaries, but features something almost foreign to Grind, throwing any core-expert for a loop - instrumental prowess, and a suprisingly heavy dose of it.

The band who immediately comes to mind here is actually None So Vile-era Cryptopsy, at least in terms of vocal delivery and skinsmanship. Frontman Ben is exactly what one could expect from Bizzaro-world's version of Lord Worm - a perfect foil to all of the weak ass whimpering and poor patterns found on the legendary album in question. Yeah, I just said Lord Worm is overrated. Wanna fight about it? Anyway, the shreiks employed here are absolutely insane, and easily best those of Anal Cunt-personality Seth Putnam, even. Vocally, not lyrically mind you. The drumming is definately comparable to Flo Mounier and other heavyweights, and fortunately lacks the random bursts of double bass blasting wankery found in the comparatee's albums. Oh snap, diss ahoy! The riffing's actually pretty complex, and has a shrill driving quality without sounding like the guys were attempting to tune to X-flat or something atypical of run of the mill "crazy chaos" acts we've so lovingly adopted into our musical scopes for whatever reason.

When you combine these elements, you simply end up with one of the catchiest, most entertaining acts I've ever heard. If tracks like Excess Baggage, Scatfest, Rotting, and A.O.D. don't get your head twitching, let alone thrashing wildly in a fit of pure metallic rage (often mistaken for an epileptic seizure) you're worse off than the well-done chaps donning the cover art.

Regardless of stating numerous standout tracks, there are really no tracks on here not worthy of listen after listen, as I often find myself just letting this album loop. My only complaint, which is irrelevant to the disc itself: these wankers haven't done a thing since 2002! They're apparently recording as we speak, but if they're anything like country-mates Fuck...I'm Dead, procrastinating is their specialty, and it'll probably be ages before it's release date's even set. Piss.

Whoa! I was blown away when I first got this in the mail.
After hearing Fuck...I'm Dead, I dared listen to the grindmadness that is Captain Cleanoff. The first song "Chemical Imbalance" starts off with an awesome riffs, then comes the insane blasts! Before I ordered this album, I had read reviews comparing this drummer to Flo Mounier of Cryptopsy and former Dying Fetus drummer Kevin Talley. He's definitely in their league. The vocals remind me of Lord Worm. The songs have speedy no-bullshit feel to them. No overdramatized riffage, solos-- just straight to the point grindcore insanity with an old-school feel! The songs are short and sweet, leaving no room for error. The only downfall is that after"AOD" ends, you're left wanting more! Good, violent grindcore from Australia!