Turbo

I can't even comprehend how the band that released Painkiller, Jugulator, Screaming for Vengeance, British Steel, Hellbent for Leather / Killing Machine and other essential metal classics released this abominable 80s pop rock record. I had to relisten to this album for the first time in years to do this review, and surprise surprise, my thoughts haven't changed one bit.

I'm just going to get the mix right out of the way, because it's really just uninspired and muddy. Defenders of the Faith had the same issue, but the difference there is that I can kind of excuse it because the songwriting is superb. This album just can't get any credit points though because of the mere fact that the songwriting on this one is just a giant step down.

I'm not going to say that the writing is bad, because it really isn't. The solos are the best part here (hence why I gave this album a 20%), and they are amazing as per usual with Priest. That's about all I can say though, because everything else sucks. The lyrics are silly as all hell, the drums are painfully dull and boring and the vocal effects radiate cheesy 80s pop in the worst possible fashion. Rob Halford does an okay job on this record I guess, but he never reaches his awesome vocal range like he does on Painkiller and Sin After Sin, creating a mostly boring listen.

I would talk about tracks from this album, but after giving it a thorough listen, there aren’t really any that are worth noting on. Turbo Lover is definitely the star of the show here. They still play that one live for some reason. I’ve never liked it, it’s boring and far too cheesy for me to care about it much beyond the whole respecting it for what it is thing. That’s really all I have to say about songs, which is really bad considering the fact that this album has 9 whole songs, and not one of them I can say anything good about. It’s a very boring listen.

At best, this album can be a little entertaining, albeit short-lived. At worst, this album grates at your ears and is boring beyond comprehension and drags on for way too goddamn long. I give this album a 20%, with 2/10 stars.

Turbo is not among my favorite albums by Priest, but I never really hated it either. The title track was always great to me, but I never really cared for the rest of the album. But it has grown on me. Today I genuinely like most of the material here, and to me, it still is the real Priest.

Yes, it's a style change, and it's not on par with their best albums like Stained Class, Defenders of the Faith, or even British Steel. But even a sub-par Priest album is still pretty goddamn good. It's not really within the band's capacity to produce music that sucks, just music that is worse than their other stuff.

The real gems here are Turbo Lover, Locked In, Out in the Cold, and Reckless.

Turbo Lover is really something special. The actual chorus doesn't kick until 2 full minutes of build-up. Contrary to what people say, this isn't really a typical "pop" structure. In most pop songs the chorus hits much sooner. But here we have a very slow, interesting build-up, where little by little layers are added over time. The gradual way in which the music builds up is what makes the chorus so damn epic and amazing. A brilliant musical composition in my opinion.

The album as a whole is driven by synthesizers, which yes, makes the album less "metal", but it also shows the band's ability to explore new territory whilst maintaining their well known head-banging, fist pounding, steamrolling rhythms. There are moments of cheesiness throughout, but I still think the songs are well written and listenable. Fortunately there are enough face-melting guitar solos so that the more synthesized sections do not make the album become boring for too long.

Out in the Cold really stands out as a phenomenal song and I would strongly recommend everyone check out the live version of the song as it was played on the 1986 tour. I had stumbled across the video online and it made me fall in love with the song. It really does make the listener feel and imagine that they are literally out on a cold night. It gave me chills to be honest. It is truly an amazing song.

Some of the songs, at first anyway, I thought were kind of lame. Basically though, the more times I listen to the songs from Turbo, the more I like them. For example I thought Private Property was pretty lame at first listen but I can't deny it is fucking catchy! Now I find myself singing along with it. Rock You All Around the World has both good and bad moments, as does Hot for Love.

Reckless is the other gem, and actually, the strongest song on the album. I must have missed it the first time I listened because it was at the end. It is the one song that I think could have fit right in on Defenders of the Faith. It is epic, passionate, and most importantly, it's METAL. It's the one song fully driven by the guitars. I'm very glad that they included this awesome heavy metal song to end the album on a very strong note.

Before properly reviewing this album, one mostly condemned by metal fans in general, I confess that Judas Priest are my favorite metal band and also being a bit blinded by nostalgia. Some feel this might disqualify me from objectivity but I will review Turbo as I do every album, on its own objective merits, reputation be damned. So of my subjectivity towards this universally panned release. After Turbo dropped in 1986 I got the chance to see the supporting Fuel For Life tour twice in a two week period. The first of these two gigs remains my favorite metal concert ever, beyond just getting to meet my favorite band, they gave an excellent performance; where the songs from Turbo absolutely slayed and every single Priest fan warmly embraced the electrifying set, especially the newer songs. My only complaint about these two shows was that in both instances they failed to play my favorite song from Turbo but more on that further below.

So my personal experience aside, what of the actual much derided album? Well, unfortunately, the biggest criticism to be found is that oft repeated, but erroneous, claim of, “This does not sound like Judas Priest,” has to be heard. That sentiment should be enough to make ones eyes roll straight from their sockets at such an absurd expectation. Judas Priest do not have a signature sound, so having a skewed expectation going into a new Judas Priest album is just setting yourself up for failure. Despite this the hate still permeates but is it truly deserved? For anyone who grew up in the 1980s, the answer would be a resounding declaration that modern critiques are embarrassingly out of touch. Now even though there are a myriad of criticisms spread across every review ever given on Turbo, they all boil down to three in particular and I will review the album by analyzing these three one at a time:

1. Outdated Production. This point is first since it is one with the most merit. There is no getting around that Turbo indeed sounds like it was recorded in 1986 and there are moments that sound like Whitesnake, Cinderella, Grim Reaper and the rest of the fledgling glam metal scene. If people can get behind the horrendous production of a significant portion of metal, or even some of Priest's own early albums, they should accept what is actually an incredible production that, at worse, removes some tenacity. The album is still expertly produced by Tom Allom, you know the guy, the one responsible for working the knobs while Black Sabbath crafted the genre into existence with their first three landmark releases, among many other classic genre defining efforts. It is safe to say that Tom Allom, just for his work in Sabbath and Priest, is as responsible for the aesthetic and style of metal as any of the pioneering bands themselves. All seven Priest albums he has produced have top notch production, the clean sonic texturing that provides every instrument a clear space to breathe; while some of the heaviness is lost in the approach they all agreed to on Turbo, it would not have made sense to rely on an oppressive wall of heavy sound here. Because…

2. Simplistic Lyrics. There is validity to this claim, but it is just a shallow observation. Due to Rocka Rolla having a couple and at least one song on every album since Sin After Sin, this makes Sad Wings Of Destiny the ONLY album in the bands history to be entirely serious in concept, tone and lyrical content. See ultra silly and vacuous lyrics are as much a part of Priest as is their DELIBERATE inconsistency. Moreover, this album actually is different from the standard Priest fare since it has none of the comic book narratives (Starbreaker, Hellrider, Sentinel) or sci-fi adventures (White Heat, Red Hot, Blood Red Skies, Electric Eye) yet is not always serious and gritty, à la Sad Wings, either. There is no argument from me that these lyrics are rather puerile by even Priest’s standards, but Priest has never exactly been Shakespearean, and since the proper head space here is energy and infectious grooves, lyrical banality is almost par for course.

While others just want to be dismissive, Turbo should be seen for what it truly sought out to be; the most fun and carefree album of the bands extensive catalogue. Halford had reached quite an imaginative prowess at visual storytelling on the masterful Defenders Of the Faith, which is sorely lacking here but as with the above point, that approach would oppose the creative intent. Like most glam/hair metal the subject matter here spends most of its time on Jovial Highway instead of Self-Pity Boulevard, so while basic and sometimes vacuous, they never overstay and detract from the musical compositions. And speaking of the music on Turbo...

3. It’s Glam Metal! Well okay … and? Something is not bad just because it is glam metal because, well... glam is not a bad sub-genre and even its strongest detractors usually give the musicians their fair share of praise for the graceful fluidity of their playing. More specifically it seems Priest received hate not because they did glam metal music badly but because they did glam metal … period. As if venturing into this territory was somehow completely blindsiding for Priest fans in 1986, when record and concert ticket sales objectively - and I anecdotally - can attest that none of the Priest fans at the shows had an issue with the bands creative turn and this is, once again, because it fits perfectly in that mid 1980s everything is fun and carefree mental state. Heavy Metal Parking Lot anyone?

For all the valid criticisms this album gets, no one can claim the band phoned it in and did everything without sincerity. There is only one ballad (Out In the Cold) which most critics call one of the highlights anyway, but the other eight songs move with tremendous tempos, most of the time in speed metal territory, enough to warrant Turbo as legit contender for title of Priest’s most consistently fast and energetic album prior to Painkiller. There is absolutely nothing simplistic about most of the riffs in the compositions here, they are as multi-layered as those found on the two previous celebrated records. Moreover, the solos are as sharp slabs of blistering steel as any during the decade. Judas Priest really should have released a full instrumental version of Turbo as it would find a whole new level of respect. Not only did these songs all slap incredibly hard during the subsequent tour but Turbo Lover is still in the set list 36 years on and its bludgeoning rhythm sections thunders as heavy as any on other celebrated releases; an absolute highlight of the bands live performances. Showing that besides the dated production and nonsensical nature, the music on Turbo is one of the most expressive and expansive collections of songs Priest has ever written.

Even songs usually derided like the cheesy and corny Parental Guidance are still richly complex in compositional arrangement, even if it seems like an attempt to be Twisted Sister. While this is the song critics dislike most, its backstory and intent is more appealing than the track itself. It was written in response to their inclusion on the 'Filthy 15' list by the ultimate buzzkill that is the moral(?) majority and despite its scathing rebuke towards that PMRC, it became the biggest hit single from the album and still has its defenders three decades later. Meanwhile the PMRC met a hilarious end shortly after taking on the rock world. This song might seem goofy and corny but the band gets away with it because it is authentic. That which is asserted without merit shall be dismissed without merit. There was no need for the band to write a ten minute epic bore about the injustice of being labeled as filthy and all that crap, they wrote a corny rebellion song because that is all that equaled the threat. Besides, rebellion is a universal topic that has, from its inception, beaten at the very heart of Rock & Roll, which is what all of this is. It also benefited most from the raw live setting, listen to the version found on Priest Live to hear how powerful it became when that dated production was stripped away.


So with those criticisms addressed, a few other factors need mentioning. Turbo, unlike the previous two classics, does not end on miserable duds. In fact the album only gets stronger as it continues - a correlation for all of Priest’s greatest albums - and to demonstrate this, three particular songs stand need special mentioning, one in the middle and the amazing one-two punch that concludes it:

Turbo cannot be that bad since Priest, more specifically Glenn Tipton, ripped themselves, more specifically himself, off on the almighty Painkiller title track. One listen to Rock You All Around the World, a speed metal anthem with some of his most electrifying guitar shredding; the exact phrasing, along with note sequence for the majority of it, is reused in the exact same cadence and placement of his legendary solo in Painkiller. Listen to the solos back to back and if you do not hear the exact sequence again, note for note, then you are just choosing to ignore it. Must not be that embarrassing if he used it again in a genre defining song four years later.

Hot For Love is a complete reworking of the bands early song Starbreaker. Not only does it borrow the same template, down to the fixed tempo, they only change the drums to a synthesized guitar drone at the very beginning and nothing else. Akin to that Sin After Sin era, this track features some of the most tasteful bass licks Hill performed during the entire decade. The solo section is classic Glenn phrasing before segueing into harmonic interludes with K.K. dueling blissfully in a lower octave. This was not Judas Priest sacrificing who they were by trying to be something they are not, this is the same classic Priest songwriting just covered with a sheen of AOR production, along with some glam sensibilities. Hot For Love is one of only two songs out of the nine offered up to feature the patented dueling of Glenn & K.K., the other being the breakneck Locked In. The other seven songs see only one of them perform the lead work and while this is drastically different than how Tipton and Downing operate, the lead work is still captivating. All of Glenn's tasteful shredding is his finest outing this side of Painkiller, and this is exhibited most on the albums true highlight, the criminally underrated and thunderous Reckless.

Due to Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days - this AC/DC knock off the only real dull moment on Turbo - being played at a few shows early on, Reckless remains the only song from Turbo to never be performed live. Beyond this most bizarre fact, there are also two special notes; it was the first Priest composition ever conceived in a tuning lower than standard, pointing to their future, but was originally considered as not just part of the OST but the official theme song for the 1986 blockbuster film Top Gun. The reason Glenn Tipton gives for this colossal failure is they would have needed to remove Reckless from the album since Warner Bros. wanted it exclusive to the OST, which Priest declined but offered four other tracks for consideration, however each were rejected. Rather one finds that a smart move or not it does prove that of the 85 original songs the band had penned by 1985, the one to define 1980s metal, it would be the enthralling and trailblazing Reckless; with its dazzlingly confident speed metal composition, efficient face melting solos and awe-inspiring performance by Halford. It provides an almost whimsical feeling of flying an F-14 Tomcat and an aura of invincibility. My second favorite song Judas Priest has ever penned.

While no singular band has ever been responsible for sole creation of … anything, very few bands can lay claim to creating 1980s metal like Judas Priest can. After the creative zenith maxed out with the “S” trilogy, where they pushed the boundaries of what metal should look and sound like forever, the band began a pattern of studio output that both never deviated from the blueprint Killing Machine yet always subverted fans expectations. So if you follow that trajectory, this album is constructed very similar to the last five. Conceptually and sequentially Turbo is near identical to both Screaming For Vengeance and Painkiller. Whereas Painkiller was Priest nesting in the ever growing thrash metal scene of 1990, Turbo was Priest nesting in the burgeoning glam metal scene of 1986, where a union formed with the arena rock spectacle and heavy metal songwriting. I realize that description plants the band as running with the pack instead of leading it, but that should not be something that carries shame or detraction.

Every single one of today’s revolutionary concepts will tomorrow be yesterday’s mundane news, not every pioneering detail needs to stay ahead of their inspired contemporaries at all times. Besides, if falling in step is seen as a negative, the band would reinvent themselves at least five more times(Painkiller, Jugulator, Demolition, Nostradamus, Redeemer Of Souls) since this record. So this was not a career killer, it was a career footnote. A brief but still solid outing in a slightly different arena to both bolster their stock and prevent their lengthy catalogue from entering monotony. Beyond my just reviewing the album, hopefully others will understand how foolish it is to say Turbo does not sound like Judas Priest. Do not let the glossy window dressing color the fact that every single detail that had been part of the bands repertoire for the previous nine albums is on full display here. Being different at least prevents the band from the worst sin any artist could commit: being boring.

One further point to prove how vacuous the take is of Priest not trying on this release and that is the sheer volume of their creative zenith, writing 20 total songs and had planned to release the album in a wildly different manner. It was supposed to be a double album entitled Twin Turbos, which would still begin with Turbo Lover, a very natural scene opener, and gradually progress over two disks with the material becoming increasingly heavier and faster. It would begin in that much subdued state before concluding with Hard As Iron. Yes, the song from the next album Ram It Down. But what is it doing here? Well...

Of the twenty written songs, nine of them make up this Turbo album while four of the ten songs that appear on Ram It Down were planned for Twin Turbos. Of the remaining seven songs, three of them were released as bonus tracks, one of which on the remaster of this very album, and three of them have never been released to the public. It shows Priest were peaking at the perfect time and was All Fired Up for this being their tenth studio release. They wanted to do something grand but newly minted management - the same that has been misguiding Priest since this very album - strapped the idea and forced the band to continue on the tried and true trajectory of the previous five albums. Notice how the next three studio albums all follow this same format as well? A trend not broken until 2001’s Demolition.

So while a great number of people will always hate on this record, it will continue to be one of my favorites. Not just as an avid fan girl who witnessed it but as far as how Judas Priest wanted to be remembered; it's the real reason they can headline concerts a full half century after starting. They never cared about consistency, instead making the brand Judas Priest be synonymous with eclecticism. No metal band, from any traditional or extreme subgenre, has a catalogue as richly diverse and purposefully inconsistent as Judas Priest does. That HAS TO mean something. There is a Judas Priest song/album for almost any mood or situation one can be in, no one reaches that by channeling their inner Iron Maiden, and the mood this brings is an optimistically bright and carefree fun. If you want any other mood or style then listen elsewhere but listen to this if you want something that is less gritty, less somber and more sunshine and beach parties. Is it coincidence this album was written and recorded in the Bahamas? If Turbo can be summed up in just one word, it would be FUN!

Highlights: RECKLESS! Hot For Love, Out In the Cold.
Worst song? Wild Nights! Hot & Crazy Days.

It's pretty much mandatory that immediately after Judas Priest releases one of their greatest albums ever, they'd have to release one of their worst. It's truly shocking to me that all three times the band came out with a mind-blowing album, the one that immediately followed is so bad. It happened after "Stained Class," it happened this time, and it will happen one more time in the future. Priest's "Turbo" is usually the one that everyone points to when referring to bad Priest. "Turbo" and "Point of Entry" are often compared because they're both awful. However, the obvious and crystal clear difference between these two albums is that "Point of Entry" is just a meandering snooze fest of an album. "Turbo" has much higher highs than "Point of Entry." However, it also has lower lows. That being said, I've always said that a 'bad' album is in many ways better than an album that isn't quite as 'bad,' but is more boring. That holds true here.

"Turbo" is yet another attempt from Priest to hit the mainstream. However, where their previous attempts always had mediocre guitar parts and nothing at all in terms of songwriting besides a half-baked catchy chorus, the components are all there for "Turbo." A lot of the riffs across the record are still solid, as are the lead guitar parts. However, the vocals, both in terms of melodies and choruses, are sickening. I've said before that I can handle my fair share of cheese in metal, but these songs are nauseating. They're not just cheesy. They are desperate and pandering. They are down on hands and knees BEGGING to get your attention. The songs don't speak for themselves. That is the true death sentence for "Turbo."

"Rock You All Around the World" is a perfect example. The opening riff is a quick, aggressive, biting riff that sounds like it could have been from "Defenders of the Faith." The next riff it transitions into is a little bit cheesier, but catchy enough for sure. Then Halford enters, and while he still maintains his incredible vocals, the melodies and mood take a sudden shift. Suddenly the song just takes on the immediate feeling of desperation and pandering to teenagers. It's supposed to be this inspiring rebellious song, but despite an undeniably catchy chorus, it's just too sickeningly deliberate to get into. It makes no attempts to hide this fact, which makes it a strong deterrent. "Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days" also has a solid riff and a chorus that is equally and frustratingly catchy. However, once again, the song is just to blatant and pathetically desperate. This is your typical party song. This song is Priest begging you to play this song at a bar or a house party as you kick back and crack open a beer. If that's your thing, there's nothing inherently wrong with that. There are plenty of bands who make their entire careers out of making music like that. The difference is that these bands aren't usually so desperate and deliberate about making 'party' songs. They usually set a mood or a tone and let the rest of the song speak for itself in terms of what it's trying to be. Priest couldn't have made this song any more clear if they put stickers on the album cover. It's cringe-worthy.

The seeds are also planted for "Out in the Cold." The keyboard intro is eerie and expressive. The intro makes it feel like a classic Priest power ballad is coming. Or a slower, powerful stomping epic. And to be fair, what it delivers isn't THAT off the mark from the former. "Out in the Cold" is one of the better tracks off this record. But once again, the melodies are just too pathetic to make it sink in. It sounds like a song that plays during an 80's action movie's credits. It's too whiny and misses the mark too much to be really memorable. The title track is another of the better tracks the record has to offer. It's basic. It's simplistic. It's an extremely dated song at this point in time. However, it's fun. And that's the long and the short of it. "Turbo Lover" is a very fun song that has JUST enough cheese. It's not overly done like most of the rest of this album. It's just that right amount of catchy without being annoying. Could it have been better? Most certainly. Is it still a fun little song to come back to every now and then? Definitely.

Two of the most sickeningly irritating songs the album has to offer unfortunately come back to back. I've mentioned pandering and desperate meandering several times already, but it gets absolutely no worse than on "Private Property" and "Parental Guidance." The former is a want-to-be tough guy song. The mood is sickening, the chorus is boring, and the very nature of the song is worthy of an eye-roll. Once again, the song is just too much of an attention seeker even when going for its target audience. "Parental Guidance" hides nothing, though. It's pathetically sappy from the first second it plays. The verse melodies have this vomit inducing false nostalgic feel. The chorus is an absolute train wreck. Not only is it not catchy and serves no purpose, but it's disjointed and confused. For some reason, they feel the need to fill time to get the chorus melody in line with the timing of the song with "no no no's" that mean nothing and serve no purpose. "Parental Guidance" is disgusting and carries no weight or ambition. I cannot see this song pleasing anyone. It's absolutely one of the worst Priest has ever offered.

If there was one thing that could make "Turbo" salvageable, it'd be the closer "Reckless." This song doesn't belong on this record. It is too good for "Turbo." "Reckless" is like a song you might find on "Screaming for Vengeance." Anyone who passes this entire album is really missing out on one hidden gem. Sure, it's no doubt that "Reckless" still has some mild cheese in it, but it's SO good. The riff is fantastic, Halford's verse melodies have a great balance of his higher notes and gruffer vocals, and the chorus is another balance of cool and cheesy. "Reckless" is easily the only song on this whole album that really feels like a true Judas Priest song the entire way through. It genuinely feels out of place on this record, but in the best possible way. You sit through this entire album that feels uncomfortable in its own skin, and then this song blazes forward to close out the album. It's almost sad, because if the entirety of "Turbo" had a similar feel and style as "Reckless," it'd have been a very solid record. Do not sleep on this track.

I think what really gets me about "Turbo" is that it shows the inconsistency in Judas Priest. Throughout their entire career, they've never had more than a 2-3 album string of consistently good releases in a row. And that's quite a blemish for a band as legendary as they are. They just never seemed to be able to sit down and accept what they were and where their fans were until way, way later in life. In closing, I think "Turbo" is better than its reputation seems to be. However, that doesn't mean it's a good record. It's far from their worst album. I wouldn't put "Turbo" in the bottom three Judas Priest records, but it hovers dangerously close to bottom five territory. For better or worse, there's always SOMETHING about this album that keeps your attention. There isn't a point in "Turbo" where you fall asleep at the wheel, and that's enough to save it to some degree.

Can Turbo live up to Sad Wings of Destiny, Stained Class, Screaming for Vengeance and all those classic Priest albums? Hell no. Does that mean it is a bad album? Well, also no actually.

Priest's Turbo is an album I can enjoy in a 'Afterburner' (ZZ-Top) ) kind of way. Just don't think about anything else the band has done, especially way back in the seventies. Just listen to it as it is. In the case of both Turbo and Afterburner that would be an album with typical eighties electronic drums, added keyboards, sing-a-long chorusses and a few hardrock riffs and leads to spice it up for the normies.

It's very much pure eighties pop-rock. It's the kind you'd expect in some eighties coming-of-age or highschool movie with a few fast cars and scantily clad teenage girls thrown in, including that first kiss during a sunset. If you're in that mood, this album is exactly what you need. You think you can expect something else with titles like 'Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days' or 'Hot for Love'. Of course you don't!

The production? Well I personally bloody love it because it makes me go back to the second half of the eighties. To some that is 'dated' to me it is timetravel.

But even to me, not all songs are equally great. The first three songs ('Turbo Lover', 'Private Property' and especially 'Locked In') are just great fun songs! Only matched on the B-side of the album by 'Out in the Cold' and 'Reckless'. The rest of the song is okay-ish. 'Parental Guidance' could've come straight from any late-eighties Kiss album and if the title 'Rock You All Around the World' doesn't remind you of Status Quo already, the chorus will do so!

Every time I hear the first 30 seconds of 'Reckless' I imagine how cool this would've been in a movie. Even the chorus could fit so many fun movie scenes.

So you see, this album feels -to me- like the soundtrack of some eighties movie which was never made. If music can activate your fantasy and conjure up images, it is doing something right and therefor I cannot and will not discard Turbo. Can someone please make a fanmade video to 'Reckless' with a DeLorean, Phoebe Cates in bikini and Anthony Michael Hall puting on his sunglasses? That'd be great, thanks.

If Priest had released this under a different bandname, as a side-project, I'm sure slightly more people could've enjoyed it for the quirky fun rock album it actually is.

With all the times I've talked about Turbo, it was only a matter of time before I have to review it. It pains me to talk about this, because Judas Priest can make great music, and they have shown that they're more than capable of making great music. "British Steel" and "Stained Class" in particular are classics and are arguably one of the greatest albums in traditional heavy metal. So imagine how shocked fans were when in 1986, the band released "Turbo" as a way to join the glam metal scene that was prevalent at the time. Literally everything about this album sucks, and to this day, it remains their worst album.

Let's start off with the instruments. The best way to describe them is if you were to take all the popular glam metal songs that were popular at the time, morphed them together, and add in some cheesy moments that would make Kraft cheese look plain. A great example of this would be in the track "Turbo Lover". The guitars play some of the most generic glam riffs ever, and they feel really dull and boring. The drums also beat in quiet patterns, and even when they beat more "aggressively", it still feels weak. And don't even get me started on those poorly-aged synths. They sound so bad and feel so out of place, that you could get rid of them and the song won't change a bit. Not only that, but the production on this album is terrible. It feels polished, but it's also rough enough to not feel clean and simple. While there are a couple of okay moments, they are very rare and aren't enough to make up for the poor instrumentals and production.

And then there's the vocals. Rob Halford's vocals on the previous albums were great, but here, they've been severely butchered. He goes for a singing style similar to other projects before, but the execution here is horrendous. He tries hard to sound epic, but there's some restraint in his voice that stops him from going all the way. A good example of this would be in the track "Parental Guidance". This track serves as an attack against the parental guidance war that was happening at the time, which sound alright for the time period, but Halford's vocals sound uninspired and weak. It's almost like he doesn't care about not wanting parental guidance. The vocals flow terribly to the instruments, and it doesn't do much to help out the already weak tracks.

But possibly one of the worst qualities of "Turbo" is the lyrics. Glam metal has its cheesy moments, but "Turbo" takes things a step further. In the track "Rock You All Around the World", this verse quotes:

In the cities of the world
You know every boy and girl
Goes crazy to the beat of rock n' roll
And as the volume is soaring
All the crowd is roaring
Let it roll

This verse talks about how everyone is going crazy at a rock concert. The way it's worded makes the concert seem generic, and its repetition of the line "We're gonna rock you all around the world" gets annoying very fast with Halford's aching vocals. The lyrics are also executed horribly. As I've stated earlier, the instruments and vocals suck, so combining this with the half-assed lyrics makes the story in the lyrics sound cliché and outdated. The lyrics are abominable, and I'm not kidding when I say this album has some of the worst lyrics in glam metal history.

Look, I don't hate glam metal. I get that some people don't like the genre and think it was the biggest embarrassment in metal before nu metal and metalcore arrived, but each genre has its own good works, and glam metal has plenty of good albums and songs. I even thought Celtic Frost's "Cold Lake" was good, even though virtually every single Celtic Frost fan loathes it. But while I'm more inclined to defend those albums, "Turbo" is something I can't defend. From the generic instruments to agonizing vocals, plus lyrics that would make the members of Mötley Crüe cringe, and it's safe to say that this is Judas Priest's worst album. Thankfully, they redeemed themselves with "Ram It Down" and eventually "Painkiller", but as it stands, "Turbo" is an album that will make you hit the brakes.

By the mid-1980s, Judas Priest had well and truly made it in the big time. Not only had they spent the previous few years working their way up to arena headliners and breaking the North American market on their own terms with their own sound and image – no mean feat for a British band, incidentally – they had also just released one of the best albums of their career in ‘Defenders Of The Faith’ and were generally riding high at the pinnacle of the metal scene alongside Iron Maiden, as well as being one of the key influences and inspirations for the emerging thrash scene. As they approached their tenth studio album therefore, they decided to commemorate this milestone by stretching themselves a little, broadening the diversity of their song writing and styles. The band spent much of their time writing and recording for the planned career celebration double album which was to have been entitled ‘Twin Turbos’. The record would utilise the band’s recent discovery of guitar synthesizers to showcase a broad mix of styles, ranging from ‘Defenders’ style guitar wizardry to romantic ballads and more straightforward radio-friendly material, theoretically providing something for every Priest fan.

The project foundered, however, when the record company vetoed it. So what were Priest to do? There were several choices available to them. They could continue in the same successful stylistic direction that had made ‘Defenders’ such a classic of 80s metal. They could try and utilise the new guitar technologies to broaden their sound and add something extra to the mix. Or they could take the ten most commercially viable songs and vie for space on US FM radio with Poison and Cinderella, because they weren’t satisfied with their already considerable achievements and wanted to push themselves into being the next Def Leppard.

The above rating should give a fairly obvious indication of which route Priest took in 1986.

‘Turbo’ is a pathetic and totally unnecessary attempt to cash in on the zeitgeist of the hair rock scene, a chronically forced and embarrassing record which nearly finished Priest’s career and dealt a fairly severe blow to their status as metal legends which the band would spend some years recovering from. Above all, it’s just phoney. There’s nothing wrong with a band wanting to hone their commercial success, but when you decide to pretty much abandon the sound and song writing approach (which has already made you pretty successful) for a musical direction that you calculate will make you more money, then you’re usually compromising your integrity to some degree, with predictably unconvincing results. Especially when (as here) your band’s new image results in you all looking like the cast of Star Trek after a heavy night at the disco.

This record is nauseating. Straight away the intro to the opener ‘Turbo Lover’ strikes the wrong approach – it’s a long drawn out guitar synth wash, rather than the pedal to the metal riffage that opened the previous album’s ‘Freewheel Burning’. When the drums kick in, processed and noise gated to the point of no return, the listener realises very quickly that a major sonic shift has taken place here, and not for the better. When the song gets going, it has a certain techno pop-metal groove to it, quite mechanical, actually. Priest had used this kind of approach before in their work with some success, but here it sounds robotic. The production primarily appears to emphasize the incorporation of synthesizer technologies into the band’s music, sapping the guitars of life and filing down the edges of their tones, and there’s a distinctly radio-ready sheen to the whole thing which sounds incredibly polished and rather contrived, underpinned by the large but empty drum tones which add an extra level of cheese to the whole sound.

This sonic approach is basically the hallmark of ‘Turbo’ and is badly mishandled across the entire album. In comparison to Iron Maiden’s ‘Somewhere In Time’ released in the same year, where guitar synths were used with a sense of taste and innovation, adding a technological/sci-fi edge to the music which still sounds contemporary, Priest’s efforts on ‘Turbo’ resemble an old guy trying to work out how to use social media in order to get “with it” in the computer age. The synthesizers are everywhere on this record, and they’re usually unsubtle, obnoxious and annoying, drenching the few passable riffs in a gleaming, plastic sheen and loudly announcing their presence in various song intros, at times comically so (‘Private Property’ starts with a chirpy synth line that seems to then go out of tune before the song starts). The effect is at times unintentionally hilarious, and in fact the album is an interesting piece of sociological and musical evidence as to how some bands in the 1980s were so taken with the new and emerging technology of the age that they allowed themselves to be completely engulfed by it, resulting in albums that sounded dated from the minute they hit the shelves. Even by 1990 ‘Turbo’ already sounded like a quaint relic from a more naive time.

The dominating synth excesses and shiny production would still be somewhat tolerable were the riffs and song compositions on or near the same level as they were on ‘Defenders’, but the major flaw of the album is that the song writing is a nosedive from Priest’s usual standards, the band seemingly dumbing down their approach for this record in order to pick up chicks (perhaps not wholly true, but not without some foundation). The riff work on many of these songs is either lame or non-existent, the music turning away from the complex and intricate arrangements Priest were known for towards a much more open and simplistic pop-rock sound. Sometimes this approach works to a degree, giving songs like ‘Turbo Lover’ a full-on epic feel, but at other times it’s just insulting to the listener. ‘Rock You All Around The World’ is the most egregious example of this, starting with an initial riff that is quite tasty and makes you think the album might be picking up a little, before shifting to a chord juxtaposition and song structure so inane that BulletBoys would have been ashamed to bring it into the studio. ‘Wild Nights, Hot and Crazy Days’ (that title!) is lowest common denominator party rock that you’d be embarrassed to play even when driving down the Sunset Strip, not helped by the fact that the guitar tones and drum sounds are at their most overbearing and obnoxious here. ‘Hot For Love’ manages to plumb new depths in terms of synthesizer misuse and makes you wonder if this is really the same band who wrote ‘Dissident Aggressor’ less than a decade before. Only on the closing ‘Reckless’ do the group pick things up a bit, shift through the gears and stretch out a little in a nod to the classic Priest style, but it’s not exactly something you’d put on the same level as ‘The Sentinel’.

It is true that Priest had made more commercially oriented and radio-friendly music before on several of their albums (particularly ‘Point Of Entry’), and a certain accessible and anthemic element had been a part of the band’s sound ever since the late 70s. However, it had never been allowed to truly dominate the song writing and composition across a whole record to the exclusion of nearly everything else as it does here, and certainly it had never been done in such an artificial and contrived way. On ‘Turbo’ Priest sound like they’re conforming to what they think will get them on the radio and confining themselves to those limits, rather than having the confidence to just do it on their own terms. Comparing ‘Desert Plains’ or ‘Living After Midnight’ to anything off this album is like night and day – those songs sound natural and are the product of a band deciding to make less complex and more accessible music because it feels right to them. ‘Turbo’ on the other hand sounds incredibly forced. The closest thing Priest had previously done song writing wise to this was probably ‘Take On The World’, but even that seemed to come from a more genuine place, despite its relative cheesiness and openly commercial leanings. ‘Turbo’ is Priest trying to construct a monster hit album for themselves at the expense of their true artistic inclinations, and the result is so artificial it fools no one. Even as a ‘fun’ or ‘party’ album it doesn’t work – despite the much darker subject matter and approach, ‘Defenders’ is way more fun and exciting to listen to than this.

It should also be noted that the lyrics are as low-grade and shallow as the music, for the most part. Gone are the tales of sci-fi figures, dystopian worlds and observances on the human condition, to be replaced by generalised romantic yearnings (‘Out In The Cold’), odes to partying all night in the summer heat (‘Wild Nights….’), exhortations for everyone to go crazy to ‘rock and roll’ (‘Rock You All….’), or embarrassing attempts to challenge authority like the band are pretending they’re still 18 (‘Parental Guidance’). Again, the lyrical style is much more in keeping with the idea of a record calculated to sell to the new, younger crowd who were lapping up anything that came out of California as long as it had hairspray and spandex. The general decline in the music and lyrics would be shocking in most circumstances, but when you consider that just two years previously the band had released one of the best albums of the decade in ‘Defenders’, it’s mind boggling. It’s one of the most glaring artistic contrasts in any metal band’s catalogue, and even now there’s still an element of bizarreness and unreality about the whole thing.

‘Turbo’ is not, it must be said, completely without redemption, and under the synthesizers and mundane song writing a few bright spots can still be found. ‘Turbo Lover’ has an excellent solo from Tipton which lifts the song up considerably and for a few moments the blending of the new musical technologies with the Priest sound coalesces into something futuristic yet resonant of its era in a way that doesn’t feel dated. ‘Out In The Cold’ has a certain cinematic feel to it (once one gets past the lengthy synth intro) and sounds quite powerful in places, helped by Halford’s emotive vocal performance. The band as a whole are actually on fairly good form musically, carrying on the tight-knit feel perfected on ‘Defenders’, it’s just that they’re bogged down by playing such substandard material. If you want to hear what the record could possibly have been had the band tried to force things less and take a more genuine approach to the song writing, the live version of ‘Turbo Lover’ found on 2003’s ‘Live In London’ album sounds much more muscular and organic and has a power and depth that the studio version lacks. Additionally, some of the unreleased tracks from the writing sessions were better than what was put on the album, (particularly ‘Heart Of A Lion’ which is easily found on YouTube) and had some of these songs been included, this album might have received a higher rating.

At the time of its release, as a commercial ploy, ‘Turbo’ initially seemed to justify itself. The album sold quite well, and the new fans attracted by the more commercial style ensured that the subsequent Fuel For Life tour was Priest’s biggest ever. However, in the long run ‘Turbo’ signified the end of Priest’s 80s rise. The sales were respectable rather than stratospheric, the new fair weather element of the fanbase soon moved on to Bon Jovi, and by the late 80s Priest were struggling to regain credibility amongst their older and more loyal fans who were largely disgusted by the ‘Turbo’ debacle. Somewhat unbelievably though, ‘Turbo’ would not prove to be Judas Priest’s nadir. The next album, ‘Ram It Down’ (partly composed of leftovers from this period) is actually worse, though in a different way. ‘Turbo’, though, remains possibly one of the two or three greatest musical errors by a legendary metal band, and despite attempts by various people to re-evaluate its merits over the years it remains for the most part a serious artistic dead end which is not recommended for the listener except as a sociological and cultural point of interest, and for the lesson that it’s always better to stick to your guns and be true to yourself as an artist, rather than chase approval or recognition from more fickle sources.

Slipped out back in '86, two years after wholesome beast and heavy metal hallmark Defenders of the Faith, is all-time Judas Priest head scratcher Turbo - called thus out of ax man KK Downing's affinity for his recently acquired Porsche - gifted to circumstantial victims by square-john, working stiff record executives at CBS. (Couldn't they've just stuck with Dan Rather's evening news?!)

Fret not, fellow illustrious citizens of a newly Covid-ed age, as the British masters' tenth LP ain't all that worse for wear. Alongside that blazing "All Fired Up" bonus track, which first appeared on Columbia Records' 2001 re-mastered CD, we've the truly corny, if not creepily twisted, hand-jobbing cover art, as well as unforgettably memorable, slam bashing and ever-iconic titular opener, complete with aerobic, 80s style synth pump-age/prosaic-as-all get out mechanized drum beat and Rob H.'s quivering ode to electric elopement to rejoice in, with Glasgow smile fit to order.

Well, in fairness, procure inevitable jollies from terrible artwork's close resemblance to kinked out, axe strumming hand gracing the cover of my first cassette proper, at age of five, of Slade's Keep Your Hands Off My Power Supply, in addition to a couple further tracks which readily get me grooving - namely, the second piece, here, after "Turbo" proper, the slap-master-bop fest "Locked In", and especially, a killer Priest number ranking up there with "Devil's Child" and "(Take) These Chains", closer "Reckless", for which the opening bars and wicked refrain return my strength, whether down and out, living out of my back(pack) on wet n' gnarly, pigeon-shit smeared downtown mean streets, or even cozily going mad, slowly, and ever-surely, diplomatically ensconced within a drying-out program, where music reigns king, even above snacks, showers and salubrious settings. In any case, the song simply sounds...so gosh darn cool, particularly the gate-smashing intro solo in tandem with breezy vocal lines, bad-ass bridge riff and, last but not least, squelching, high-wire, cybernetic lead demarcating said comfy closer like a quiff parting fastball inside the strike zone.

In other words, both are hard-driving, knife-jacking, roundhouse adumbrating seizers fit for valedictory, pick-up bar bloody caesars. Arf! Much of the same, however, CANNOT be said, or espoused in any manner, as far as pedantically stiff, twin "P" arena clearers "Private Property" and "Parental Guidance" go! The jury's still out regarding which fares worse. Yeah, so the keys at former's inception prove mildly auspicious, but that's the bulk of it as remainder epitomizes the most contrived, boxed-in and cornered brand of corporate clap-trap known to man, woman, hermaphrodite or transvestite (without even considering wacky world of select, made-up-on-the-spot pronouns). That chorus! "Keep your hands off! My private property!" Sure, Halford's voice still contains power and oomph. It's simply such a waste he's got to yawp such limp-wristed diatribe, especially, as fellow colleague(s) reminded the masses, how could the gang so fiercely protect all that's holy and worthy in rock and metal, prior to relaying this broken, tepidly ha(s)ted mess of facile rhythms, compounded so by lack of pyrotechnic leads across the board?!

Most everything depreciated, I believe, has been yelled to MA rafters and beyond, particularly for G rated mega-turnips "Parental Guidance", the anthem-sized, albeit utterly banal, "Rock You All Around The World", and, notably, a number so bad it's actually great, in its own lopsided, kitsch way: "Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days"...Haha! Guys and gals the Earth over wince in delight as Rob and co. wax bubbly and ribald like a bunch of beach-combing, horny teens on Spring Break.

The equally synth-a-fied, if not veritably longer, 6.5 minute B Side "Out In The Cold", along with randy crotch-grabber "Hot For Love" (on which we're treated to some of Rob's cranky low-mid range), for their part, have moments, few and far between - certainly no Riot or UFO, or any Priest, proper. Looking back at the 1980s, if I wanted token glam reprisals (of both nature) would hit up some Cinderella, Mama's Boys, Ratt, or, for want of something saucy, France's glamy-but-unclammy Fisc.

Insofar as JP's Turbo is concerned and spurned, save for token few gear breakers, demarcates Metal Gods' lowest point. Only, remember to release emergency break before pushing through at low to (bi)nary throttle.

"No one can stop me now
I'm like a human dynamo
Live wired and chargin' out with power
This time I won't hold back
I'm rarin' to get up and go
Fuelled up and growin' by the hour

Look out!
I'm blastin' through the lines
Alive and kickin'
Watch out
I'm young and lethal
I'm goin' from here until eternity!"

Turbo is essentially a decent album, but it's not 'real' Priest for me. I mean, let's consider the facts, Priest were probably the most important metal band between 1976 until 1984 - filling in that time period between thrash's dominance and Sabbath's post-Sabotage slump and creating so much of the stuff we take for granted (so much so that it seems so might forget just how much Priest gave us) and this album, simply, represents the start of their downfall (from which they never really recovered - sure, they managed to get a boner on Painkiller but it was not without much puffing and panting in the bathroom prior to that). Certainly, Point of Entry was the first chink in the armour - or was it that Rocka Rolla first showed they were willing to release an album they thought to have substandard production? - but that album merely lacked direction whereas Turbo shows the band actively following trends rather than starting them.

Turbo was, for the first time, Priest showing themselves to no longer be leaders in the metal scene, but rather a band searching for direction.

It's not erroneous for those who consider this to be Priest's hair metal album; the LA DNA is certainly splattered all over this thing but there's also other aspects of the 80's mainstream rock zeitgeist here. I mean, the synths certainly have something of a resemblance to ZZ Top's incredibly successful and pretty damn cool Eliminator album. Hell, even KK's solo on 'Locked In' seems a little laidback and Gibbons-esque, especially in comparison to Glenn's more typical shredding. That's certainly cool, too, it shows they can play this style very effectively. And that, in itself, serves as a microcosm of Turbo; Priest can almost get away with it when you forget that this is Judas fucking Priest.

Of course, some things can't be forgiven so easily. There was never any reason for a band with as much class as Priest to write something like 'Parental Guidance'. I mean, guys pushing 40 trying to write the aural equivalent of having an argument with your parents? Fucking shite. It sounds like something that Def Leppard would have left on the cutting room floor. 'Rock You All Around the World', again, aims for anthemic and ends up us trite. If only you would have stopped trying to speak to dunderheads in high school and write some real metal.

At its best, however, Turbo shows that Priest could be a great pop metal band (that point was proven by several tracks between '79 and '84, however). Particularly, it's great to see Halford spreading his wings in this new sound. The double tracked chorus on 'Locked In' and the whole very 80s but very cool chorus on 'Out in the Cold' work well for me. Again, it's weird to hear him going from a state-of-the-art metal performance on, say, 'The Sentinel' to very poppy material here. But man, Halford could sing the phone book and sell it well.

KK and Glenn really let things slip here, though, it's just baffling hearing them go from writing the metal rule book to seeing them taking cues from Pete Willis and Steve Clark (good players in their own right, but not really heavy metal legends). I mean, the riff work on this album is flaccid in comparison to anything prior to this. I mean, what's the best riff here? 'Reckless', perhaps. Would that even make the top twenty best riffs on Screaming for Vengeance? And the best song on the album, 'Turbo', isn't really driven by the rhythm guitar at all.

Honestly, Turbo is disappointing not due to an outright lack of quality, but rather a shift that reeks of finance. Priest were desperate to move on to a bigger audience at this point. Perhaps they thought they were really capable of a Pyromania style album? But that ignores the most important chapter in the "How to Sell Out (and Get Away with It)" book: you need to appease your old fans, too. In the documentary on the making of Metallica's eponymous album, the band and producer discuss how you need to have some songs on your sellout album that go back to an older style. I have a hard time believing that the Priest twin-turbo engine was running so low on fuel (gas, sorry, you were an American band at this point, right?). Then again, they did release the incredibly fucking poor Ram it Down (or, "Turn it Off" as I call it) two years later and that was apparently the 'harder' stuff meant for an aborted double album, so maybe that was it. Oh, well, nevermind.

File under: Saxon putting potatoes in the spandex.

When English dogs wanted to sound like US poodles... Just look at the band photos from this era! The guys didn't have enough hair to compete in the Big Hair League (TM), but they certainly wanted to sound like hair bands.

Okay, North America was a huge possible market for metal music, and it surely was noticed by record labels and managers of good artists and bands hailing from good old England. Just think about Def Leppard and Ozzy Osbourne. But Judas Priest? Judas fucking Priest! There cannot be any other reason for these atrocities but sweet, sweet US$. Okay, the band was always looking for news ways to make heavy metal and rock music, but some roads should have left untraveled. But what's done is done...

This album includes heavy use of guitar synthesizers. Not the first time for the band, but more extensively than before. A good example is cold-sounding yet hot-souled 'Turbo Lover'. Its machine-like, irresistible thumping rhythm, steely guitar licks and Rob Halford's unique vocals made the song legendary. It still sounds British enough, but already on the second track, 'Locked in', them glam/hair rock traits come on stronger. They come to make the music fluffier, not stronger.

Poppy guitar playing, their airy and syrupy tones, and love lyricism abound (the opener went straight for sex anyway). 'Private Property, 'Parental Guidance', 'Rock You All around the World' and 'Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days' show Judas Priest peaking those "sweet" levels of sex, syrup and rock 'n' roll, the US way. Images of sunny Venice Beach, with people wearing über-colourful clothes and massive hairdos, that's what these songs conjure. Plus rolleskaters... And definitely not motorbikers! That vibe is a big part of the album, and while other songs have more familiar JP vibe to them, many contain heavy glam rock elements. It just sounds too much like Van Halen, Poison or any other cream-assed glam rock band at times. So, This was a cash grab, period. Maybe there was something to do with the choice of recording studio, which was Compass Point Studios in Nassau, Bahamas... But then again, JP's mighty contender, Iron Maiden, recorded their three legendary and epic albums there, and they definitely contain no glam, not one bloody bit!

Slower and more heavy metal-ish, somewhat eerie 'Out in the Cold' contains a lengthy guitar synthesizer intro and fine symbiosis of guitarists K.K. Downing and Glenn Tipton. Generally, there is no shortage of great soloing, as expected. The thing about JP's guitar solos is that that they are melodic and memorable, being really composed, not just shredded out as fast as possible. However, machiney guitar tones make the album often softer and lighter that it would be with the real crunch. On the whole, this was an experiment gone too far, because sometimes the album feels like "spot the guitar" game. 'Hot for Love' sounds streetwise, despite for its title, and is the bright shining star of the album. And the closer 'Reckless' comes close. These two songs also were b-sides of the singles cut from the album, 'Turbo Lover' and 'Locked in', by the way, so the band knew what was the best material here (with 'Out in the Cold' if you ask me). So, majority of the album is glam-infested. But, fine bonus track 'All Fired up' is another saviour, reminding of previous albums' stuff.

Rob Halford sounds more or less strained on this album, especially when he goes to higher notes. Uniqueness of his voice does help to some point, but his abuse of drugs and alcohol can be heard. This point was brought up on "Behind the Music" television series, so I'm not judging it, just telling the truth. Surely, there are some neat high-pitched helium-shrieks and screams heard here, too, but here his lower frequencies work better. Dave Holland was a drummer with simplistic styles. He did provide the beat here, for sure, but bassist Ian Hill give it life with his playing, that is sometimes straight, and at others more finger-twisting. The rhythm section made the guitar synthesizer-plagued album sound meatier, surely. This remaster's sound is very clear, but the lower end is what it is.

'Turbo Lover' is one of the most played songs by the band on radio and TV channels, and that's why it is easy to buy the album; it's simply a fine single. Sadly, the majority of the songs have too much pink bubblegum in them trying to keep them together. Far from the essential JP albums in general. When you buy the two singles cut off of this, you'll get 4 best songs, but miss 'Out in the Cold'. But then again, this is sold cheap as dirt these days (including great 'All Fired up', 'Locked in' live version and very short liner notes; please note, that score is given with these extras, especially 'All Fired up' getting it up a bit). There's also more extensive reissue with 2CD live out which might not be as cheap...

(Originally written for ArchaicMetallurgy.com)

It had to happen. But WHY?! Just like Judas Priest took the metal throne from Sabbath's clutches a decade before, the second most influential Birmingham (and world) metal outfit saw themselves outpaced and deposed by a London quintet named after an iconic torture instrument. And as with Sabbath, the throne was Priest's to lose, which they did following their mentors' steps by producing sub-par material in a pathetic attempt to 'sound fresh'. As the Irons passed them by, heading into a kingly first-place finish of the 80s decade in the classic metal category, the Priest reached its lowest point, plummeting from the glorious heights of Defenders of the Faith into the unexpected vapidity of Turbo, or as I like to call it, Rejecters of the Faith, an album that is as heavy and interesting as the cardboard mattress of an unfortunate hobo. That's what happens when you trade the badass Metallian with its baboon/lion menacing stare, fiery roar and two pairs of red-hot Gatling guns for a nail-polished bland hand grasping a kinky-android-looking gear shift.

Truth be told, Iron Maiden's discography had been more exciting and consistent in quality that Priest's during the 80s, but at least, before this album, both bands were on the top echelons of classic metal mastery. The turn for the worse was a decision Priest took due to several factors, but since Defenders of the Faith and its subsequent tour had been commercially successful, money was not an issue. Supreme guitar duo Tipton and Downing manifested their appreciation for the new sounds and technologies the mid 80s were providing, a trait they shared with Dave Murray and Adrian Smith, as noticeable on Somewhere in Time. But that's where the comparisons ended between those two great Brit bands, and their '86 releases. Probably the main reason that made Priest go all glammy on us, was Rob Halford's experiencing really tough times. But the Metal God, who is no ordinary man, decided to not be dragged down, and instead focused his passion in being more colorful and changing his lyrical subjects into more laid back and casual themes (meaning: 'pop'). Post-apocalyptic antiheroes and belligerent metallic beasts where replaced by relationship issues, the merry aspects of rock 'n' roll life, self-esteem and a disdain for censorship and well, “Parental Guidance”.

Can't blame the Metal God, nor the rest of the Priest for steering this way. If this is what needed to be done so they could carry on, then we're more than grateful, as just four years after this they would produce la crème de la crème of all-time metal music with the Painkiller. But that doesn't erase the fact that this sucks big time. BIG FUCKING TIME. Turbo is an album so rooted in mid 80s clichés that as I listen to it I can't avoid picking up the scent of cheap hair spray and feeling my denim jeans turning to spandex. Indeed, the only positive aspect I can think about this, apart from saving the Metal God's emotional sanity, is that a few of the tunes here provide a casual, playful relief from time to time. The title-track and “Locked In” are undoubtedly catchy, and once the cheese bombardment leaves your 'I-only-listen-to-real-metal' defenses like a fondue, you can't help but to consider adding them to your 'hidden guilty pleasures' list. A couple of other songs are saved from utter suckage by perhaps a pair of solid riffs or a kick-ass solo (“Hot for Love”), but don't offer much apart from that. “White Nights…” unabashedly borrows more AC/DC than needed, even when the style of the Aussies was starting to feel tiresome already at that time. And I won't waste time in writing about other tracks… with the exception of “Out in the Cold”, The six-minute Side B opener is a somewhat different specimen, more serious in tone, like a longer, yet lighter spiritual younger brother of “Love Bites” from Defenders, featuring a compelling synth intro. That one and the first two tracks are the only passable material here.

For those of you money wasters, if you happen to own the 2001 Remaster, you can enjoy a more than decent bonus track named “All Fired Up”, which recalls more the style of the preceding record, and basically it's just as good as the best track on the original pressing. The original idea for Priest was a Twin Turbos double album with a second LP of harder and faster songs that never came to be, some of the unused tracks appearing on Ram It Down instead, but I can't think why “All Fired Up” wasn't used in any of those releases. In any case, its existence alone is not good reason enough to buy this, unless you're a Judas Priest completionist. And in that case I'd advise to get the Turbo 30 version instead, which has an appealing retro-80s color palette on the original Doug Johnson cover artwork and a dual disc live concert from the Fuel for Life World Tour gigs.

As a Judas Priest fan (without-'atic'), Turbo signifies a descent in quality that just can't be forgiven, even to the Metal Gods. But for the record, I do dig Doug Johnson's nail polish design.

To avoid misunderstandings, I have never drunken piss and I do not intend to do it. Nevertheless, I am sure that the headline is right. "Defenders of the Faith" was larger than life, gigantic and heavy. "Turbo" was painfully commercial, totally polished and gruesomely meaningless. One might think that the ridiculous cover says it all, but far from it! The sonic atrocities are much worse than the mechanized artwork.

Synthesizers, everywhere synthesizers, already the quasi title track makes me sick. Like armies of vicious beetles, the synthetic sounds crawl out of the speakers in order to infest your mind, your skin and your ear canals. I hate to say it, but in order to stay fair I must admit that "Turbo Lover" spreads a certain atmosphere due to its proper construction. Judas Priest know how to utilize the computer comrades. Congratulation. Better still, to play with keyboards seems to be their new core competency. But generally speaking, I do not want to listen to music pieces which are based, firstly, on synthesizers, secondly, on synthesizers and, thirdly, well, guess you know what I want to say. This beginning sets the course for a trip into perdition. Well, it is the most sterile form of perdition you have ever seen. Anyway, it is terrible. Songs like "Out in the Cold" are cheesy, harmless and superficial, but exactly this track wants to be a kind of ballad. With that said, one can accept one track with this configuration. I admit that some dignified instrumental parts and the slightly nested ending are almost tolerable. With a large dose of good will one can say that "Turbo Lover" and "Out in the Cold" make the best of the situation.

The sad rest of the album - and "rest" means seven tracks in this context - is nothing else but a pile of sonic and lyrical excrements. Help me to forget these useless and stereotyped lines. It does not make sense to have a close look at the texts. Already the song titles speak volumes: "Rock You All Around the World" - innovative! "Hot for Love" - spectacular! "Wild Nights, Hot and Crazy Days" - jackpot! Do you really want further details? Lines like "You know every boy and girl / Goes crazy to the beat of rock n' roll"? I don't think so. But there is another strange detail that leaves me stunned. A more than solid speedster was dropped during the record session. Total triumph of stupidity! Check out "All Fired Up", a more or less close relative of songs such as "Rapid Fire" and "Freewheel Burning". You can find it on YouTube. Ask yourself why this sledgehammer has not been taken into account. The answer is clear, it was just too heavy and would have destroyed the nerve-shattering homogeneity of the completely relaxed song material. As a logical consequence of this dubious strategy, Judas Priest wallowed in their self-made hell of airy tones and cheap melodies. Do what thou wilt has always been a very ambivalent motto and here it shows its ugliest face. You are always welcome to defend the faith, but you cannot betray your followers just two years later. Too bad that the presentation of timid guitars, powerless vocals, clicking drums and overly simple - I beg your pardon, I wanted to say catchy - lines is nothing else but an act of betrayal.

It does not take much to hate this emotionless masterpiece of sterility. Just listen to a plastic tune like "Parental Guidance", the exact opposite of everything which can be deemed as good music. Or lend an ear to "Locked In", another prime example of songs that the world did not ask for. In a nutshell, this album is only recommendable for those who visit this website due to some unintentional inputs. Anyway, if a turbo engine really sounds like this soulless crap, I prefer to drive go-cart.

Let's face it, it's happened to nearly every metal band in the 80's. It happened to Raven, it happened to Saxon, it even affected Celtic Frost. This happening is when a band signs on to a major label, or is one one already, and they are told by their producers to go for a more radio-friendly sound. What really surprises me is that this album was produced by none other than Tom Allom, who produced many of Judas Priest's albums as well as many of Black Sabbath's. He even produced Def Leppard's "On through the Night", at a time when Def Leppard actually sounded good. I have no idea what Mr. Allom or Judas Priest were thinking when they cranked this out, cos it sure sounds WAY different than their previous releases.

One thing that makes this album stick out like a sore thumb is its use of synthesizers. Up until now, Judas Priest had practically never used synthesizers, and now, songs like "Turbo Lover" and "Out in the Cold" are full of its sound, so much so that it kind of outweighs the heavy guitar sound that Priest is known for. Now, synthesizers aren't really bad, I mean, there are bands like Dio that use them to a great effect. It's just that when synthesizers are used to create a sci-fi-like sound that mirrors that of Devo, and the band that is using them to create that sound is known mostly for music made with guitars, there's bound to be problems. Oh, and there's also the robot-like voice in the chorus of "Turbo Lover", another thing that bothers me about the song.

Another fault with this album is that Judas Priest almost completely strayed from their style of heavy metal. In the case of "Parental Guidance", the band discarded the idea of making a blasting, aggressive-sounding song in favor of making a cheesy one revolving around getting away from your parents. This kind of songwriting would work well with Twisted Sister, but Priest? Nuh-uh! "Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days" is a pretty goofy and dumb song about partying. Priest writing songs about having a good time is nothing new (ex. "Living After Midnight"), but this particular song just sounds like something straight out of a Motley Crue album. Just put your hair up as high as a four-story building, and Priest would be set to make Bon Jovi fans squeal with excitement....or not!

I swear, I must have heard those riffs before! "Hot for Love and "Locked In" contain some of the most generic, cookie-cutter riffs I have ever heard. Come on you guys, You're Glen Tipton and K.K. Downing, you have GOT to come up with something more creative than this! Are you even trying to create music, or are you trying to imitate, or even become, one of those glam bands? Cos those I'm pretty sure that glam bands at that time wouldn't think too much about creativity and focus more on what kind of lipstick they should use. Guys you're not Poison, you're not Bon Jovi, you're JUDAS PRIEST. We should be hearing more songs like "Tyrant", or "The Sentinel", not this garbage!

I'm not sure if Tom Allom had a hand in making this album sound the way it does, cos it really doesn't sound like anything he'd produce (except Loverboy, yeah he produced an album for Loverboy). Maybe he was pressured by Columbia Records to try and make Judas Priest into a glam band that would be easy for mainstream audience to follow. Still, Priest could have made the better choice and create something like "Painkiller", which, fortunately, would happen in 1991. But "Turbo" is a horrific pile of dog dung that should be known not as a classic, but as one of the biggest mistakes Priest ever made. Guys, you're already filling up arenas with the sound you have and you've already made your mark in the music world. What more do you want? You have bands named after your songs, you have GOT to know better than this!

Among the Halford-era Priest albums, this would seem to be the one fans like to rip on the hardest. And frankly I can't blame them. Turbo here was Judas Priest's big foray into that sweaty, testosterone-filled jungle that was late-80's glam metal, and they certainly didn't leave in any stops in their effort to fit that mold. Gone are the rip-roaring screamers about hellions on motorcycles, government satellites, space invaders and evil warlords; instead we get 9 super-synthy pop-rockers about sex and partying all night long, a la the poppiest tracks off of British Steel only made much more embarrassing in this case. For longtime fans of Priest it was a blatantly commercial bid for a good spot in the charts, and left a bad taste in everybody's mouths that only Painkiller 4 years later was able to cleanse.

This makes it all the more begrudging to admit that I actually kind of like this album, and listen to it way more often than I probably should. The fact of the matter is that, even being that the songs are as objectively vapid as they are, when I take the opportunity to take my head out of my ass for a bit it turns out that a lot of them are also pretty fun. I have to confess here that glam bands are kind of a guilty pleasure of mine, and it's really for just the reason that their music is just catchy, dumb, easily digested rock music. And certainly one of the more remarkable characteristics of Priest was that they were at one point able to make their music accessible while keeping it creative and at the forefront of what metal could do, but really they're so damn good that even their glam album rocks harder than what most of the competition was doing.

The lyrics are a common complaint in regards to Turbo. I'd certainly be insane to claim that they were anything but moronic, but really most of them are not that much dumber than the ones on, say, "Living After Midnight" or "Fever", and those songs rule my balls and yours. There are some true stinkers here, particularly "Parental Guidance" which takes the "grown-ups are so lame, man!" style of songwriting to levels of cringeworthiness that I don't think even 80's children's cartoons are allowed to. Lines like "How would you know, anyway? You're just Mr. Dull!" ...Gaaaawd, it sucks. I also think "Wild Nights, Hot and Crazy Days" is both the laziest title and chorus for a Friday night party song I ever heard. Lucky for me, I tend not to focus much on the lyrics when I listen to most music, so the crap-factor here doesn't detract for the experience for me that badly.

That leaves me then with the instrumentals and the quality of Halford's singing, which are really quite good for the most part. The biggest and most glaring problem for most people is the extensively and awkwardly used synthesizers, which come to the front everywhere and gave me a pretty bad first impression of the album. I did get used to them, but I give you fair warning that they are everywhere, right from the first notes played in "Turbo Lover". This track, by the way, is one of my favorites on the album. Again ignoring some inane lyrics, it works really well by starting out kinda quiet and building up to the first chorus. The solo is decent but nothing to write home about. The other two standout tracks for me are "Locked In", which has a good headbanging riff, and "Out In the Cold", which has more force and weight behind it than most other glam songs out there. Most of the percussion unfortunately sounds like it's coming from a robot, which for this particular album may actually be half-true, but Glenn, KK and Rob are all still forces of nature even when performing songs as silly as these, and as the reigning metal gods they certainly show the competition a thing or two about how to play glam metal, even if not how to actually write it. The other tracks are a mixed bunch, sometimes fun, often boring, but generally don't deliver anything too memorable. The closer "Reckless" always disappointed me, never bringing anything to a satisfying end the way Priest's best closers are able to. It just kinda rocks along on autopilot for a few minutes and then fades out.

On the plus side, it doesn't leave the listener clamoring for more. Turbo is an enjoyable listen, with the right mindset, and for what it is it is a worthy album indeed. But it was not a direction that Judas Priest was really comfortable going in, and in choosing not to pursue it any further I can confidently say nothing of value was lost.

Ah, yes. The hated Turbo. The much maligned Turbo. Accused of everything from being glam to murdering infants, I was much surprised to find my head banging in a quintessentially 80's sway. Ok, I'll easily admit it's not typical Priest. The songs DO sound dated and very mid-80's. Yeah, it is VERY cheesy. But hey, when has cheese stopped a self-respecting Priest fan? Their entire sound is based around being the most ridiculous band around. There are a few dud songs here, but this is not just a radio rock album. There are a few gems on this album, one of which appears towards the end (Reckless) and another that appears right squat in the middle of the album (Out in the Cold.)

Lyrically, I'll admit, this is hard to take seriously (is Priest ever easy to take seriously?), but that doesn't hinder my appreciation of this album. Halford sings his heart out as always, so WHAT he's singing is irrelevent. Halford's still Halford, Tipton is still Tipton, and KK is still KK. While most of the songs here are mid-tempo, they're still a fun bunch. This is not Judas Priest's most musically deep album, and it doesn't seem to warrant as many repeat listens as other albums, but I still catch myself rocking out to more up tempo songs like "Locked In" or "All Fired Up". This music wouldn't sound out of place in, say, Back To The Future or its ilk. It's great to listen to, and like most of Priest's post-1980 catalog will get you energized. If they performed these songs live they wouldn't sound out of place in the middle of the usual setlist.

This is Judas Priest's most commercial album, but do not let that deter you from enjoying this. There are kickass guitar solos on Turbo, and, to put this plainly, Judas Priest will blow whoever their competition is clean out of the water. I've seen them live, and they always find a way of completely owning the competition. This is the case with Turbo. It's mid 80's radio metal, but it completely demolishes the competition still, proving that whatever Priest decide to do, they will usually come out on top in the end. Besides, British Steel is almost or equally commercial. Despite my personal feelings on the matter, it's usually hailed as a JP classic.

At the end of the day Judas Priest are good songwriters. They're good at writing catchy, rocking, and heavy songs, and even on their more commercial ventures, they still manage to put out an album full of what we expect from Priest: catchy licks, molten steel guitar solos, energetic drumming, powerful and ear-splitting wailing from Rob Halford, and Ian Hill standing near the back, doing his thing, and chicken-necking the whole time. I understand a little trepidation about the "radio" feel of Turbo, but it's worth it to leave our self-consciousness at the door and rock out to Turbo.

After releasing two of not only their best albums, but two of the best metal albums of all time (Screaming for Vengeance and Defenders of the Faith), Judas Priest went all in. Instead of playing it safe and releasing another similar album, pleasing the fans with maybe some minor complaints of being a little repetitive, the band decided to experiment with their next album Turbo. Originally meant to be a double album with material from Ram it Down and be known as Twin Turbos, only the first nine songs made the cut. And thus, Judas Priest's most controversial album was born. Adding in elements of synth and pop characteristics of the then-rising genre of hair metal, the band no doubt incited massive backlash from their legions of fans who longed for the days of Breaking the Law and You've Got Another Thing Comin'. But what many fans to realize is, behind the new bells and whistles and glossy coat of paint, it's still Judas Priest and Turbo is still a a pretty good album.

The main change of this album is the presence of more electronic keyboard/synth elements, often times used to distort the guitars and give them a more computerized and electric feel. But no, Glenn Tipton and K.K, Downing's superb guitarwork is not "corrupted." On the contrary. Not only do the riffs have a cool cyber feel to them, they still deliver shredding guitar solos on nearly every track. And while there are certainly more pop and "feel-good" elements in the songs' melodies and choruses reminiscent of hair and glam metal, vocalist Rob Halford has never missed a step, and this album is no exception. While not shrieking quite as high as he did on songs such as Screaming for Vengeance or Freewheel Burning, more times than not Halford is singing in the higher registers while still utilizing his famous baritone. And while pop influences mean the lyrics aren't quite as rebellious or in-your-face as Judas Priest is known for, there's still plenty of songs based on love, sex, and rock n' roll. Turbo Lover gives you the feeling of actually speeding down the road and launching into outer space with its electronic and synth sound effects and intense build-up (coupled with lyrics consisting of hilariously cheesy double entendres). Private Property is medium-paced but has one heck of a catchy chorus, and Rock You All Around the World is fast and fun. Out in the Cold is an interesting power ballad that starts off soft and builds up in intensity and heaviness, and Reckless is an extremely solid rocker.

While many of the songs on Turbo utilize synth sound effects and have a lighter pop feel, this is still by and large a Judas Priest album. Rob Halford is still singing, Downing and Tipton are still shredding, and Turbo is still metal. Just because a band like Judas Priest was willing to change and experiment, that does not mean they completely forgot who they were. Diehard fans will still most likely be polarized, but if you've never listened to the album, don't listen to everything you hear. Give it a listen, you might be surprised to find it's still a Judas Priest. And a pretty underrated one at that.

Turbo has always caught a bit of flack from a segment of metaldom due to its ridiculous levels of accessibility, but let's be honest about this: Judas Priest, bless their hearts (up to and including 1990) has never exactly but Public Enemy No. 1 in terms of the aggression they incorporate into their music. Nonsensical accusations of subliminal messaging aside, they've always had a knack for the huge, friendly chorus parts that thrust them into the spotlight alongside the rest of the popular hard rock/metal radio of the 70s and 80s, and while their music might have seemed edgy in '78, hits like "Breaking the Law" and "You've Got Another Thing Comin'" always held an appeal to a wide cross-sampling of society, from the rich to the poor to the young to the elderly to the black brown white yellow green purple or whatever other compartments we place ourselves in.

So it's not really hard to believe that Priest would follow up the success of such pieces with an album that is largely wrought of a more 'commercial' party rock aesthetic that might have been generally associated with but not limited to KISS and Twisted Sister. For me, Turbo has always been THAT album, that cutting loose of the more serious elements you'd heard on most of their prior efforts and a focus squarely on catchy rock tunes that could appeal to the average high schooler of its day (or middle schooler, in my case). Granted, 1986 was the year of such lauded monoliths as Master of Puppets, Somewhere in Time, Reign in Blood, Fatal Portrait and Awaken the Guardian, so it might not have been in Priest's best interests to pursue this course when such quality was emerging from the underground (or from their own British peers). When held up against any of those records, or many others, Turbo seems trite, silly and juvenile by comparison, but in of itself I think this is still a fun record for a road trip to summer camp, arms and legs flailing out of the bus or your parents' station wagon en route.

If I've got any complaints, they'd revolve more around the actual production of the record and the fact that, despite nearly every song having some catchy sequence somewhere in the vocal progressions (Judas Priest was not a band known for much 'filler' on their early albums), not all are equally memorable in the long term. This is perhaps the most 'synthetic' sounding of their full-lengths, with the guitar synthesizers sounding immensely cheesy dowsed in their post-prog relish (the intro to "Out in the Cold" being a prime example), but in general the guitar tone does not feel adequately vibrant or powerful to really carry its hooks into infinity. The songwriting is of course meticulous, with tracks like "Turbo Lover" perfect sequences in alternated verse-chorus pop bliss, and very little flair or flash to the guitars beyond their measured, muted verse riffing, emboldened power chord chorus escalations and the requisite leads, but in retrospect I think the sound Judas Priest and Tom Allom settled with here might have benefited from actual fucking balls, as opposed to the timid tones of a turtle half afraid to emerge from its shell.

As for the consistency of the cuts, I will say that it's hard to tell Turbo was extracted from the theoretical double LP that the band initially proposed (Twin Turbos). All of the tracks seem to flow smoothly, the first half loaded with memorable choruses like the instantly recognizable title track, the desperate and uplifting "Locked In", the beefy mid paced rocker "Private Property" with its clapping electronic percussive strikes and the youth anthem "Parental Guidance" which felt like a more constrained lyrical alternative to Twisted Sister's "We're Not Gonna Take It". As the album progresses, you get some moodier, slightly more serious pieces like "Out in the Cold" which might have been a passable Journey, Foreigner or Triumph track sans the slicing timbre of Rob Halford, or the ballsier "Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days" which is total cock rock that could just as well fallen under the banner of KISS, Mötley Crüe or the Scorpions, but catchy nonetheless. Some of the later tracks, "Hot for Love" and "Reckless" don't exactly stand out to memory, but they're flush enough stylistically with their lead-ins.

The individual performances on Turbo are enthusiastic without hinging on the provocative. Rob clearly paves the way, his melodies the most impressive on the album, but Downing and Tipton throw in a few good, curving hooks while the rhythm duo of Holland and Hill keeps pace like a team of horse-drawn metronomes. The guitar synthesizes, which are careening and cavorting about the structure of the songs as if they were just testing the ice and afraid to go skating, can prove distracting in places, and the leads in tracks like "Locked In" and "Rock You All Around the World" are worthwhile if not their most memorable. But as usual, they practice enormous restraint in their performance, with no undue fills or excess wanking (aside from perhaps the over use of the synth atmospheres), letting Halford run the show, and for this reason the divisive reaction of some of the metal audience to Turbo, or Priest in general, is not unsubstantiated, even if I happen to disagree due to the typically great hooks the band tended towards.

After Screaming for Vengeance and Defenders of the Faith, two of the better albums in their entire canon, Turbo did and still does feel like a mild disappointment, but only in the way that this was the first point at which they felt like they were not keeping current with what was happening elsewhere in the genre. The momentum seemed to grind to a halt, even if they were still able to elicit some fun from the songs. With thrash, speed and power metal exploding, death metal just on the horizon, Turbo feels like an evolutionary step backwards, and Judas Priest weren't really able to reinvent or reinvigorate themselves until the explosive, and unforgettable Painkiller which stood out even against a far heavier landscape of thrash. As far as its song selection, I do prefer this record to its successor Ram It Down, of which a few tunes were also drawn from the 'Twin Turbos' writing sessions, but when held up against their greater legacy, Turbo doesn't emerge a favorite. A sunny, melodic and lighted hearted romp that I'll break out seasonally, fun for the whole family (including the girlfriend, who will generally rock out to at least "Turbo Lover") but nothing exemplary is happening and it doesn't feel like a direction I'd want Priest to further explore.

-autothrall
http://www.fromthedustreturned.com

There is a longstanding consensus that in the mid 80s, particularly in the year 1986, Judas Priest ceased to be a metal band and went the path of other earlier heavy metal mainstays like Grave Digger and Celtic Frost and jumped on the glam rock train. Now if there is one thing in the world that I truly hate it’s a consensus, that decrepit destroyer of all things original and individualistic about the music we all know and love. Be this as it may, like with any other viewpoint, it lives or dies by its accuracy and not by how many people hold or refuse to hold it. “Turbo” is an album that isn’t so much troubled, but rather tends to trouble a lot of people, but often for the wrong reasons.

To dispense with the two clichés that often followed this band of either them starting to lose it after “Stained Class” or that this album simply leaped out of the mid 80s due to pressures from the changes in the rock mainstream, there is a logical way to look at this album as the logical conclusion of a progression from mainline 70s hard rock with a few pioneering metallic elements to 80s mainline rock with a few left over metallic elements. The result is a sound that is signified a bit more by the over-processed, mechanical drum sound that was very popular in the 80s across the musical spectrum, and a barrage of synthesizer and guitar effects that are not associated with Priest’s past efforts.

Be this all as it may, when discounting the similarities this album shares with Bon Jovi’s “Slippery When Wet” and Cinderella’s “Night Songs” in a production sense, there is still enough distinctively Judas Priest about this album for it to be recognized as being one of their albums. The distorted guitar tone is still well within the paradigm established on “Defenders Of The Faith”; the riff work still has some bite to it that cuts through much of the keyboard malarkey. Sure, songs like “Parental Guidance” and “Reckless” are about as formulaic and cliché as they come, but they aren’t that terribly far removed from a lot of the fun that happened on Ozzy’s “The Ultimate Sin”, and if they cut the synth-like character of the drums, some of these songs could pass for Twisted Sister.

One of the factors that really make this a fun listen in spite of itself is the unavoidable catchiness of the whole thing. Granted, this holds true for a number of fairly sappy albums that were burning up the charts while the likes of even Metallica and Anthrax were considered fringe, but when hearing the upbeat rocking of “Locked In” and the unforgettable mix of punchy power chords and spacey keyboards that is “Turbo Lover”, I tend to hear the same good natured rock that won me over to 80s ZZ Top when I was a mere 6 year old lad with no real sense for music. Leave us forget that this was also a time when the mainstream rock scene didn’t completely frown on musicality and both Tipton and Downing put on a riveting display of lead shredding that actually rivals most of their previous solos.

Sure, this is one of the weaker albums that bear the Judas Priest insignia, yet it somehow manages to keep me coming back despite my general all metal, the entire time attitude towards music of late. It could be chalked up to it just sounding worlds better than the shit the radio plays nowadays, or childhood nostalgia, but this just sounds fine to my ears though it is definitely among the shallowest and formulaic of albums to come out of the 80s. I can understand someone who was in his teens during the mid 80s and fighting the mainstream by spending their cash on the likes of “Reign In Blood” or “Darkness Descends” hating this with a passion, I just don’t.

Ladies and gents we're back to my favorite band in the world, JUDAS MOTHERFUCKING PRIEST! The album today..."Turbo"? Uh-oh. 1986's "Turbo" was an album that marked a change for Priest. They began to experiment with a more commercial sound, adding synthesizer guitars, synth pulses and even those awful drum machines to the formula. The result was an album that till this very day still continues to violently divide metal fandom right down the bloody middle.

Admittedly, the performance of the band is a bit more lackluster this time around. The usual aggression, wailing and punch of Halford's voice is scaled back here; he now sings a good chunk of the album with a slightly bored-sounding mid-ranged hum. It works well for some of the more atmospheric numbers, but what the Metal God was thinking and feeling during the recording sessions is anyone's guess. Downing and Tipton on their guitars are the brightest spots here, riffing it up big time and trading off their solos with more gusto than album offers overall. Ian Hill is nothing special here; he just sort of drones along himself, although he does spout a few okay riffs or fills occasionally. Dave Holland rounds it out (unevenly mind you) on the drums. I have a personal vendetta against this guy, as I solely blame him for a majority of Priest's lack of sonic speed and technicality during the 80's. His drumming is so boring, so pedestrian, that Halford, Tipton and Downing had to write WHOLE albums down to painfully simplistic levels so his lame "tap tap taps" could keep up with the wholly superior musicianship of his fellow cohorts. Why they kept this guy through the whole damn decade is beyond me, but I guess what it is what it is.

There are two kinds of songs of this album: basically, ones that suck, and ones that don't. Major suckage: "We don't need no...NO NO NO Parental Guidance yeah." Ugh. Aside from that SLIGHTLY groovable chorus, this is one lame, pandering little number that should be forgotten at all costs. Shoot on sight! This is immediately followed by "Rock You All Around The World". The chorus is slightly better, as is the surprisingly scorching solo, but the lame, kitschy lyrics kill it dead. Up next is that album "epic", "Out In The Cold" with it's aggravating overabundance of synthesizers and slow, plodding nature. Skippable! Then there's worst song on here, "Wild Nights, Hot and Crazy Days". This is fucking garbage; it's totally lame Poison worship from the back to the front. Hazardous to your health!

Higher Points: "Turbo Lover", the album's quasi- title track, has rich atmosphere, a damn fine solo with goof Downing-Tipton trade-offs, and a slow, spine-tingling build-up to the chorus. The more uptempo "Locked In", despite its corny lyrics, is catchy, fun and has probably my favorite solo on the album, short as it may be. The heavy, slightly sinister (sounding) "Private Property" is now up. More silly lyrics, yes, put it's offput by the heaviness, a loud Tipton-led solo, and a great rhythm to the song. A personal favorite is "Hot For Love", with it's dark, sleazy atmosphere, hard drumming and some of Halford's meaner vox on the album. The fantastic "Reckless" ends it all. This a cool, high energy song with a killer upbeat chorus, damn good melody and lyrics, I must admit, I fucking love. And if you're lucky to have the Columbia remaster, you'll also get the great "All Fired Up" a speed metaller in the fearsome but upbeat vein of "Reckless", only faster.

Overall, this album does have some serious problems. About four of the songs are pretty bad, some so much so that I'm sure it'll ruin the experience for a few of you. But fear not, the good songs are indeed stronger. If you can get past the bad numbers and sense of commercialization, then you'll be rewarded with a metal nugget of fun.

Judas Priest – Turbo – 1986

Here is a little lesson in music history:

1986 was the year that everyone began experimenting with synths and drum machines. Bands like Halloween from Detroit and even Iron Maiden began to dabble into the mainstream with these keys to disaster, although Halloween and Maiden pulled it off without compromising their roots. It was metal mixed with the typical mid-1980’s sound. They moved with the times and mixed the elements. Priest, on the other hand, went all out commercial in 1985 with the start of the Turbo record. This was no dabbling into commercialism, this was like a fat kid doing a cannon ball into the shallow end of the pool. Not a very pretty scene, is it now? Turbo is not entirely awful. In fact, it has some pretty worthy cuts, but back in '86, it looked as if Priest was riding the murky wave of commercialism.


The album kicks off with a track that I hate with a burning passion, the annoying “Turbo Lover”. The song is devoid of any life that Priest once had. This is more of a drum machine driven, synth- laden, radio friendly tune that gets on my nerves due to the overuse of the song by my local station. It is not a bad song in moderation, but everyday gets a little tough for a diehard Judas Priest fan like me. The next song is also very 1986-ish, but the tempo is kicked up a notch, and that is where it stays for most of the album. The album is virtually devoid of any traditional Priest numbers that hark back to the days of Stained Class. The only one that seems right on the album is the 6 and a half minute “Out In The Cold”. With that, the number is still laced with sappy synthesizers that tend to get a bit obnoxious at times. Processed guitar synths are another thing that is rampant on this record. Go and listen to the beginning of “Locked In”; that is what I am talking about here. There is no real guitar sound on the album, and if there is the lucky chance, it is only about a few seconds long. The only song devoid of these is my personal favorite, “Reckless”, the album’s closing track. This has to be the track that makes everything worthwhile on this relatively boring glam metal platter. The only reason this gets a rating above 70% is because of effort. This album really show the effort Priest showed. There is a good amount of great guitar work, but is obscured by the guitar synthesizers. The vocals are in top notch form here. They are loud and proud as always in the delivery from the metal god himself, Mr. Rob Halford. I have two copies of this record, one on the original Columbia pressing (CD) and the remastered CD version that features the amazing outtake “All Fired Up”, which is a great road rage song (from personal experience) and a worthless, dime-a-dozen live version of Locked In that sounds almost identical to the studio version, guitar synths and everything.

The lesson here, kiddies, is don’t sell out. Not everyone will like it. It is a lucky thing that I liked it a lot. It is a rare occasion. I have not met one other person that likes this album who also has a mind for early Priest. Don’t give into the big labels that makes you look like suckers for the money. Will I ever place this above Stained Class or Sad Wings Of Destiny? No way, I never will! But it is a good listen every once in a while. K.G

So the story has already been told to death; that about Priest’s increasingly
commercial direction after ‘Stained Class’ and the pop-metal sound and synthesized guitars which were used for this recording. The end result of this is an inconsistent Priest album structurally – most of the tracks have at least a couple of solid sections, but the pop elements which are prominent in several tracks serve to weaken and limit the potential for the sound, especially during the choruses of “Rock You All Around the World’ and the terrible ‘Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days’. With this said, the synthesized guitars are mostly prominent in some intros and solos, such as “Hot for Love’ and ‘Turbo Lover’ respectfully, but don’t really get in the way of some screaming heavy metal riffs to form the backbone of this underrated Priest album.

‘Turbo’ begins with the title track, ‘Turbo Lover’, which is probably the most unique song on the album due to its slow buildup, relatively deep and melodic vocals and incredibly catchy solo. This might be the best song on here – the riff at about a minute and a half in kicks the song into high gear, and the epic chorus and cheesy lyrics drive the point home. Also definitely worth watching is the music video for this song, for the epitome of mid-80’s cheese. ‘Locked In’ has a nice opening riff and lead (again with those heavily synthesized guitars) before turning into a midpaced rocker, the verses of which can almost be described as speed metal due to that riff :-) Again, an excellent chorus here melodically, albeit with cheesy as fuck lyrics. Also worth mentioning is Ian Hill’s consistent pummeling of the low end. The opening section of the title track as well as the verses of ‘Locked In’, have some excellent rumbling bass work and a few little runs here and there.

This is the point where a lot of fans turn on this album, and it is definitely understandable. Aside from possessing a decent main riff and another catchy-as-fuck chorus, the riffless verses and uninspired vocal performance by Halford definitely sink ‘Private Property’. Dave Holland is pretty much a Lars here as well, pure plodding beats and generic fills (fills?). Again, ‘Locked In’ is a great example of how a more complex drum pattern could have loaned a more metal touch to it, and turned the verses from a ‘tap your foot’ to a ‘smash your head’. But here, he is at his worst with a drum score that would make ‘The Unforgiven’ look like ‘Bleed’ in comparison. ‘Parental Guidance’ is much more of the same, good chorus (as far as sounding like Whitesnake goes) but a complete lack of riffs, aggression, speed or anything resembling metal aside from the decent solo.

Although those last two songs certainly blow and are not metal, the next song ‘Rock You All Around the World’, is a sad attempt at some speed and fails even more than those. This piece of shit fails miserably on almost all counts. And that includes the ok opening riff and the good solo section. The repetition of the chorus is vomit-inducing, and I skip this track almost every time I have listened to this album save for when writing this review. Weak drumming, complete nonexistent bass lines, lyrics which read as though they were written by a cretin, and that damn stupid fucking chorus. This song makes me that angry, and is a perfect example of the several failures of this album. Lucky for me, things pick up again with ‘Out in the Cold’. Showing for the second time (after the ‘Turbo Lover’ solo) that the synthesized guitars can be effective, the intro is epic and melodic and sets the tone for the dark and well crafted ballad. (“I feel as though I’m out in the cold!”). A great solo and redeeming, heavy metal song later, the track is over and I am satisfied

Unfortunately, the rest of the album does not live up to this, and for the most part, sucks as bad as the worst of ‘Demolition’ and ‘Point of Entry’. ‘Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days’ (not typing that again) is easily the worst song on here, with its AC/DC, plodding verses, the second worst chorus on the album. No redeeming features here; even Halford sounds like shit during this one, and the drumming is of course absolute crap. ‘Hot for Love’ has a bit going on with that ‘Defenders’ style opening riff, but turns into another ‘Private Property’ during the verses and has a boring, terrible chorus. The rest of the song feels drawn out, and “Reckless’ does nothing to fix this. Aside from a decent opening riff, it is basically the most forgettable song on here, and definitely the most mediocre and middle of the road. Here the album ends, in an unspectacular fashion. Sure, there was some magic on ‘Out in the Cold’ and the first couple of tracks, but was that worth having to listen to boring, derivative tracks like “Rock You All Around the World’ and that other crappy AC/DC ripoff?

With the 2001 remasters came several bonus tracks which were from the ‘Turbo’ sessions but were left out for one reason or another. The score for this review however, will not take these songs into account seeing as they were not included on the original release. Of these, I have heard two, ‘Red White & Blue’ and ‘All Fired Up’. The former is an awful homage to their home country, but it is full of cheese and bad production, as well as a complete lack of riffing. Had this been on the final album, it would be amongst the worst. However, the other track is a complete enigma. Why ‘All Fired Up’ was left off ‘Turbo’ remains a mystery to me. Fucking brutal speed metal! Awesome opening riff, devastating verse riffs, soaring vocals by Halford, and holy shit, this song is definitely in my top 5 for Priest! Having heard it after buying the reissue of this album a couple of years back, it has been in heavy rotation anytime Priest is on. Had this been included on the album, it would have been the best track far and away, and would’ve pushed this review up a few points. It would have worked so much better ending the album than “Reckless’, or provided a speedy afterthought to ‘Out in the Cold’ instead of the worst song on here. These are the mysteries of life and death.

So as I said, overall, this is pretty bad. I’ll give it a 72, because despite the pop, most of the songs are at least catchy and pleasant to hear. It’s not like having to endure Mudvayne or Poison or anything like that. Songs like the title track, ‘Locked In’ and ‘Out in the Cold’ make this worth listening to though, just skip past songs 5 and 7. And for god sakes, check out ‘All Fired Up’!!

My, my... what do we have here? Could this be... no, it couldn't be... it is Priest, after all... wait... no, this can't be! This can't possibly be the same band who wrote "Victim of Changes," or the same one who so elegantly covered Joan Baez's "Diamonds and Rust," or even the band who came up with "You've Got Another Thing Comin'." They're too good for that. Surely they wouldn't disappoint their rabid fanbase, right?

WRONG.

This is worse than Metallica's blunder. It's worse than Diabolus in Crapsica. It's even worse than Heretic. What we have here, quite simply, is possibly (actually, likely) the worst sellout the world has ever known. To think that Judas Priest, the righteous Gods of Metal, would create such an abomination is a disgrace - no, a kick in the groin - to everything heavy metal, and good music in general, has ever stood for. Never before or after has there been such a shameless conformity to trends, and there likely never will be. This, not Slipknot, and not Job for a Cowboy, is the absolute worst piece of steaming mule dung the bowels of the music industry have ever spewed forth.

Halford - the godly, the amazing - has become nothing more than a degenerate and lifeless glam singer. He never screams; he never shows any range. He's constantly in the high register, and not in a good way. Ian Hill, an underappreciated bassist, gets the treatment he deserves, but at the worst possible time. He plays nothing but eighth notes below the guitars for the entire album, and probably would have been better off not playing at all. Dave Holland does no wrong, if by wrong one means straying from a boring and typical heavy drum beat characteristic of the worst of glam rock. K.K. Downing and Glenn Tipton lose all of their soul, all of their heart... everything they churn out is glam of the lowest quality. This, by far, is the worst performance any of them has ever done, and probably will ever do.

The album opens up with "Turbo Lover." Now, what could anyone expect from such a title but boring glam? They say not to judge a book by its cover (or a song by its title) but it really doesn't apply in this case. What you see is what you get - trendy glam with all the requisites: dumb, bland instrumentation; soulless vocals; obnoxious lyrics - and this one even comes with a crappy, uninspired "solo." This is the song that would immediately become a "hit" back in the mid-eighties, what with every idiot on the street blasting stupid Winger songs from their car radios.

With such a terrible opener, it couldn't possibly get much worse, right?

Again WRONG. Next we are subjected to "Locked In," which is pretty much the same thing, except without the, ahem, "catchiness." Once again we have love-obsessed glam lyrics, and some more terrible instrumentation. You can pretty much expect to hear the first song again, for the most part. And then... it just gets worse. The next two songs are filled with the one and only... teenage angst! Yep, it's just "you just DON'T UNDERSTAND!" written a bunch of different ways. And "Parental Guidance" is the worst offender. Wait, since when does Judas Priest play pop punk? It's like Green Day fused with blink-182 and AFI and every other craptastic band you can think of in that style, only a hundred times worse simply because it's coming from a notoriously awesome (at least in the past) heavy metal band. Check this line out: "You went through the same thing too!" If that's not the most angsty line in history, then nothing is. It's enough to make you puke out your intestines. More follows suit with "Rock You Around the World," "Hot for Love," and "Reckless."

Then there's "Wild Nights, Hot & Crazy Days." Think washed-up era AC/DC at its worst, combined with stolen riffs from every other rock band out there, then amplify it by a hundred orders of magnitude. Now you've got this song. It's so shamelessly copied, it might as well be a cover song. And even then, it wouldn't be a cover of Priest caliber.

And what's this? A ballad? Could this be the saving grace of this total sellout? Perhaps a "Beyond the Realms of Death," a "Before the Dawn?" No, it's not. In fact, it's a power ballad - of the most ridiculously cliched type. Starting with a synth intro that unsuccessfully attempts to be brooding, the song drags on for six minutes and should end much, much earlier. It is the most irritating song on the entire album (a veritable feat).

All in all, Judas Priest's Turbo is the album of choice for one who wishes to end his miserable existence by smashing his head against a wall in disgust. Thankfully, the band would improve a bit on Ram It Down, writing a couple of real classics - but they would not truly redeem themselves until 1990 with Painkiller.

Take this as a lesson - the bigger they are, the harder they fall.

I consider this one of of Judas Priest greatest albums, yup you heard me. Sure, it may not be one of their most heaviest or most aggressive releases, and it sure as hell is no Painkiller or Stained Class, or even a Defenders Of The Faith, but it's defiantly one of their most catchiest album, and it's fun as hell to listen to. This album is not for everyone, especially if you're not a fan of glam/80s metal, but if you absolutely love the genre (like I do), than this album surely has something to offer for you.

In 1986, Judas Priest wanted to do something different for their next album. They decided to use guitar synthesizers which makes the whole album sound very 80s like. 1986 was also the year where glam metal's popularity was arguably at it's peak. As a result, many metal fans accused this band of "selling out", because of the amount of glam elements Turbo has. However, Judas Priest were already very popular at the time.

Onto the album now, my favorite songs on here have to be Turbo Lover, Locked In, and Rock You All Around The World. The first song has sets a pretty cool atmosphere with the guitar synthesizers, and it's very catchy. Locked In has some pretty cool lyrics, and that guitar solo is absolutely amazing. Rock You All Around The World is a pretty cool fast paced song, and it almost sound speed metalish if it weren't for the cheesy chorus. However, it's very fun to listen, in my opinion. Some other good songs on here are Parental Guidance, Out In The Cold, and Hot For Love. The first song reminds me of something that Bon Jovi would do in the 80s, with it's chorus. Out In The Cold is a ballad thta sets a great atmosphere. It has to be one of their best ballads. Hot For Love is an awesome 80s metal song with very catchy lyrics, and awesome guitar soloing. The worst song on here, even though it's still pretty good, is Private Property. It just isn't as interesting as the other songs on this album.

If you dig 80s metal, or if you just want a Judas Priest album that just sounds different, than defiantly pick Turbo up. However, if you don't like this style, than stay away from this album. After Turbo, Judas Priest would go on to continue to pursue their trademark heavy/speed metal sound, and they would nail it pefectly four years later on Painkiller. However, Turbo is the only album with this unique style of heavy/80s/glam metal fused together with a whole lot of fun in between, which is why I like it so much.

Moving further into the 80s, Priest courts controversy by embracing the “glam” sound that was making waves on MTV. With all the new developments metal was exploiting to the full now, this must have seemed immensely lacklustre, not only compared to the old Priest albums, but to everything that was going on. If I was into metal at this time, I probably would have just laughed this album off and gone back to cranking “Pleasure to Kill” up to 11. But listening to it in this environment seems to benefit it more.

I have a bit of a weakness for the whole 80s “glam” thing, but even so it seems almost inappropriate that the molten metal machine that is Judas Priest should be making dabbles into it. They don’t do it nearly as well as many bands that were committed to churning out this stuff, but the mix of it here with Priest’s haughty metal sound turns out some sumptuous tunes and marginally less embarrassment than might have been the case.

It may seem like it doesn’t gel satisfactorily at first, from the perverse pomp of “Turbo Lover”, rife with electronic, inorganic sounding drums and sweeping guitar synths. Though, it’s a popular Priest tune and the fired up riffs beneath the surface do keep it on its toes. Glenn and K.K. are unfortunately understated on the studio version. The production reeks of the Hollywood strip more than anything and does makes it measurably dated compared to their other albums. The main thing for most of it is that the new ideas get more or less overdone, with the exception of Rob’s voice. He’s wilfully holding back his extreme falsettos on this, and attempts to fall in line a bit with the Vince Neil’s of the day.

The album does work okay in Priest’s favour as they always creep in those undeniably rock solid metal riffs that play crucial parts in “Private Property”, “Rock You All Around the World”, “Out in the Cold” and “Hot for Love”. They aren’t just tucked away into a small corner, instead ringing out loud and proud up with the drums in the mix. See? They’ve still got it. The lavish guitar synth decorates Glenn and K.K.’s solos with a lush coating, and they still rip out some quick fingered, hell blazing fury on “Rock You…” and “Hot for Love” that leave the rest underneath. Though the dated cheese is not always fresh, “Parental Guidance” is an insipid anthem that got them a hit for the album, but loses all touch with the Priest identity still here. Even the fun, pop showiness that gives the album a certain charm loses its flavour with this one. This is just way too prissy for Priest, but I kinda dig the chorus.

The bonus tracks don’t need much of a mention. “All Fired Up” sounds like a more typical 80s Priest number but is a weak recording and has “B-side” firmly stamped on it. “Locked In (Live) is another fairly decent live recording but also appears in a different (and probably better recorded) version on the “Priest… Live!” video so it loses purpose. It does sound a lot more “Priest” without the synthetic layers though.

They were definitely trying to go some way to emulating the “glam” bands that were flavour of the week, but used their established sound as a convenient foundation, so it’s not totally indistinguishable from the traditional Priest sound. They got more new fans out of it, but realised this wasn’t the direction they were most comfortable in, and four years later we get “Painkiller”. A winner is you!