Gargling with Infected Semen

Seeing as there has been only one other review of this album since its release, I thought I should offer another perspective.


I'll keep it brief: the production quality of 'Gargling with Infected Semen' is not great, the kick drum mostly sounds like clicking and there isn't a great deal of variety in guitar tones. However, there are some memorable riffs throughout; 'Menstrual Cunt Fart' is a firm live favourite and the outro section of 'Love 'Em and Cleave 'Em' at least demonstrates familiar death metal tremolo picking. The intro samples add to the comic nature of their self-styled 'Pussy-Plundering-Porno-Grind' - emphasised further by the frankly revolting/hilarious booklet artwork.


Mark's vocals are sub-human and somehow not inhaled, more of a guttural belch. While there are (for the most part) no intelligible lyrics, I don't think there is any need, as the vocals act as another rhythmic instrument in the mix. There is a noteworthy amount of repetition of vocal hooks, which doesn't exactly help promote song individuality. The bass is consistently present and adds serious groove - as the previous user mentions, this album is certainly heavy in its delivery. It is fast and brutal, 'Dead Hungry' being a particularly relentless example.


While it is by no means perfect, Gargling with Infected Semen is not a bad first effort from a band whose sick humour is complemented by their continually strong live performance of this early material. This album provides a basis of brutal riffing and stand-out vocals with shoddy production value, which has since been greatly improved. The I would advise anyone who takes Amputated too seriously to reconsider what it is they're looking for within this music.

I feel like I just listened to the same exact song for 24 minutes. I can nearly listen to this album three times in an hour, so that’s what I did, how? I have no fucking clue; it must be that it was insanely heavy. But other than that this album has nearly no redeeming qualities. I would seriously rather rip my esophagus out and then rub it in John Goodman’s diarrhea and put it back in.

That’s funny because that sounds like on of the intros to the songs. Every single song has an intro like that. Here let me tell you one of them; “Christine, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole. Sabrina don’t just stare at it, eat it.” I do not hate on the obscure and vile intros, I just think that if your album is only 24 minutes long half of it should not be intros. Overall the album does not catch me in the slightest bit; I guess I can’t get into music that sucks.

These are vocals? Are you fucking kidding me? I don’t know how a person can make a noise like this; all I know is that he should fucking stop. The vocals sound like a combination of a couple things; one is when I did not eat enough Wendy’s and my stomach is growling pretty hardcore, another explanation could be it sounds like a toilet flushing for 24 minutes straight. There is another vocalist that does the higher pitched scream? No it isn’t a scream sounds more like he is in agony because he is getting sodomized by a porcupine; on top of this it is extremely predictable when these vocals will kick in. Back to the other vocals, seriously what the fuck, does the band honestly think it sounds good? There is not one comprehensible word; I don’t think there even any lyrics because all he is doing is burping the whole time. Why? This guy seriously sucks, they proved it on MythBusters.

Trying to listen to the guitars without listening to the vocals was a hard task to do because the vocals suck so much. I guess the guitars are ok, I would still much rather rip my esophagus out and then rub it in John Goodman’s diarrhea, the album would not be so bad if it was just the instrumentals. One of the only redeeming qualities like I said before is that it is insanely heavy; this is obviously the case with most death metal. I have been told before that all death metal sounds the same, I do not believe that is true, but I don’t think this band wrote more than one song. No solos=lame, pussy ass breakdowns, even though they basically are one 24 minute long breakdown, and they play the same riffs for every song. This band is the Dragonforce of death metal, the only difference is I don’t think all the little scene boys can understand music this heavy. They are the Dragonforce of death metal because they are going to write at least two more albums that sound exactly the same as this one, which means they will still suck.

I thought death metal drummers played fast and actually had talent. I can’t tell if this guy is trying to blast beat or if he is playing with the drumsticks in his mouth. Besides the extremely slow playing for nearly any type of death metal the snare sounds like he is hitting the bottom of a plastic bucket. Apparently the drummer only owns a bass drum, a snare, a hi-hat, and a ride cymbal. I didn’t know Ringo Starr came back from the depths of crapiness to play really bad again. I don’t usually mind boring ass horrible sounding drums if everything else is ok, but as you can tell everything so far sucks.

Now I know I say all the time I know absolutely nothing about playing the bass. But it is obvious to say that the bass player is the best talent in the band. He fulfilled the bands random ass bass line quota before the end of their career at the beginning of Ice Pick Trachyotomy, hahaha look that can’t even spell tracheotomy right. Well the bass is the only part that does not make me want to do the thing that involves my esophagus again. The bass player does not excel in skills, as opposed to other members he just proficiently plays the bass and it sounds good.

Now concluding the blasphemy fest this album was a complete waste of my life, I only wrote a review on it to save the agony for you. This album is for people who like groovy not death metal and are fans of toilets who do vocals. I will never listen to this album ever again because this has lowered the bar to a new level of suckage for me. Ha, I thought Six Feet Under sucked. If I were to pick a song that did not completely suck and make me want to kill myself it would be Gargling With Infected Semen, the title track just barely escapes complete suckage. Wow I just realized the vocalist sounds like he would be gargling with infected semen in his mouth, I now figured out how to sound like a toilet.